Showing category "Humor" (Show all posts)

Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Voice AI:
https://beta.elevenlabs.io/Babyagi

Birthday cake

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 2, 2023, In : Humor

My father drank so heavily, when he blew on the birthday cake he lit the candles.
-- Les Dawson

Website 4 the day:

Check if a website is a scam:
https://www.scamvoid.net/

Affair of the heart

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 2, 2023, In : Humor

Don’t talk to me about Valentine’s Day. At my age, an affair of the heart is a bypass.
-- Joan Rivers

Website 4 the day:

3D for everyone:
https://lumalabs.ai/

My family tree

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 2, 2023, In : Humor

I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

360° worlds:
https://www.blockadelabs.com/

Animal testing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 4, 2023, In : Humor

Animal testing is a terrible idea because they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.

Website 4 the day:

Build Android apps:
https://appsgeyser.com/

Add insult to injury

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 4, 2023, In : Humor

The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you’re signing somebody’s cast.

Website 4 the day:

High-performance Python compiler:
https://github.com/exaloop/codon

A wheat field

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 4, 2023, In : Humor

I looked at a picture of a wheat field. It was grainy.

Website 4 the day:

Windows automation:
https://www.tinytask.net/

Killed by wild pigs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 31, 2023, In : Humor

A friend was killed by wild pigs. He was boared to death.

Website 4 the day:

Tron script to save old PCs
https://www.makeuseof.com/old-windows-pc-usable-tron-script/

An archaeologist's life

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 29, 2023, In : Humor

An archaeologist's life is in ruins.

Website 4 the day:

Trainable machine:
https://teachablemachine.withgoogle.com/

Delivered by stork

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.

Website 4 the day:

N digits of Pi:
https://arxiv.org/ftp/arxiv/papers/2201/2201.12601.pdf

Save a boyfriend

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day - and another, in case it doesn't rain.
-- Mae West

Website 4 the day:

AI tools reviews:
https://www.futuretools.io/

Why called the Dark Ages

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

The Middle Ages were called the Dark Ages because there were too many knights.

Website 4 the day:

AI draws an image:
https://instantart.io/

What clients want

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

Clients don't care about the labor pains; they want to see the baby.
-- Tim Williams

Website 4 the day:

AI easier animation:
https://cascadeur.com/

Walking into a bar

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar. It was tense!

Website 4 the day:

AI tools:
https://www.futuretools.io/

Quotes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

I prefer to make up my own quotes and attribute them to very smart people, so that I can use them to win arguments.
-- Albert Einstein

Website 4 the day:

Domain benchmark:
https://www.grc.com/dns/benchmark.htm

A pony with a sore throat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A little hoarse.

Website 4 the day:

Glary utilities:
https://www.glarysoft.com/

A lot of growing up

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.
-- Zach Galifianakis

Website 4 the day:

Light-weight screenshots:
https://getgreenshot.org/

What a family means

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

Being part of a family means smiling for photos.
-- Harry Morgan

Website 4 the day:

Open source video app:
https://kodi.tv/

Knowing the ropes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
-- Mae West

Website 4 the day:

Open source paint program:
https://krita.org/en/

Chew bubblegum and kick ass

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 7, 2023, In : Humor

I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum.
-- Emily Elizabeth Dickinson

Website 4 the day:

Revo uninstaller:
https://www.revouninstaller.com/

The strawberry cried

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

The strawberry cried because he was in a jam.

Website 4 the day:

Profile picture generator
https://magicstudio.com/photobooth

Don't talk about yourself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

Don't talk about yourself, it will be done when you leave.
-- Wilson Mizner

Website 4 the day:

Make pictures with words:
https://magicstudio.com/imagine

Why?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?
-- Robin Williams

Website 4 the day:

Remove unwanted things:
https://magicstudio.com/magiceraser

Even Napoleon

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

Even Napoleon had his Watergate.
-- Yogi Berra

Website 4 the day:

Write faster:
https://hyperwriteai.com/

Have enough sense

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

Have enough sense to know, ahead of time, when your skills will not extend to wallpapering.
-- Marilyn vos Savant

Website 4 the day:

Smart copy with AI:
https://snazzy.ai/

What to do

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

After all is said and done, sit down.
-- Bill Copeland

Website 4 the day:

Create a character and talk to it:
http://character.ai

Never take a solemn oath

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

Never take a solemn oath. People think you mean it.
-- Norman Douglas

Website 4 the day:

AI creates videos:
https://invideo.io/

Looking for my watch

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I meant to look for my missing watch but couldn't find the time.

Website 4 the day:

Create resumes with AI:
https://flowcv.com/

Like an elephant

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met.
-- Herb Caen

Website 4 the day:

AI-enabled speech:
https://murf.ai/

A stationery store

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I saw a stationery store move.
-- Jay London

Website 4 the day:

Make content with AI:
https://runwayml.com/

Pairs of shoes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I did not have three thousand pairs of shoes, I had one thousand and sixty.
-- Imelda Marcos

Website 4 the day:

Webchatgpt form Chrome:
https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/webchatgpt/lpfemeioodjbpieminkklglpmhlngfcn

Stolen

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

What contemptible scoundrel has stolen the cork to my lunch?
-- W. Clement Stone

Website 4 the day:

Duplicate voices with only 3-second samples:
https://valle-demo.github.io/

Remind me of my age

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I don't need you to remind me of my age. I have a bladder to do that for me.
-- Stephen Fry

Website 4 the day:

Cross-platform password manager:
https://keepassxc.org/

Inventing the internet

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

The day I made that statement, about the inventing the internet, I was tired because I was up all night inventing the Camcorder.
-- Al Gore

Website 4 the day:

Encrypt your data:
https://cryptomator.org/

Eating electrical cords

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

My son has been eating electrical cords, so I grounded him until he conducts himself properly.

Website 4 the day:

Terminal emulator:
https://tabby.sh/

If two wrongs ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
-- Laurence J. Peter

Website 4 the day:

Login aliases:
https://simplelogin.io/

To be or not to be.

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

To be or not to be. That's not really a question.
-- Jean-Luc Godard

Website 4 the day:

Understanding voice:
https://openassistant.org/wp/

Memories

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.
-- P. G. Wodehouse

Website 4 the day:

Cheaper flights:
https://skiplagged.com/

I love mankind

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I love mankind; it's people I can't stand.
-- Charles M. Schulz

Website 4 the day:

Kodiak - take control of Windows:
https://null-byte.wonderhowto.com/how-to/use-koadic-command-control-remote-access-toolkit-for-windows-post-exploitation-0181742/

I don't deserve this award

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.
-- Jack Benny

Website 4 the day:

Free documentaries:
https://topdocumentaryfilms.com/

Before ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 6, 2023, In : Humor

Before I refuse to take your questions, I have an opening statement.
-- Ronald Reagan

Website 4 the day:

Free movies:
https://www.freemoviescinema.com/

Why skeletons don't trick or treat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 2, 2023, In : Humor

Skeletons don't go trick or treating because they have no body to go with.

Website 4 the day:

Make instant music:
https://boomy.com/

Can't kiss

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 2, 2023, In : Humor

I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed my hair.
-- Bette Davis

Website 4 the day:

Image generation by AI:
https://platform.stability.ai/

Miami Beach

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 2, 2023, In : Humor

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.
-- Lenny Bruce

Website 4 the day:

Fast email:
https://superhuman.com/

Unfortunate

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 2, 2023, In : Humor

I have an unfortunate personality.
-- Orson Wells

Website 4 the day:

Free Google search:
https://www.scaleserp.com/

Not a member

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 2, 2023, In : Humor

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

AI playground:
https://playground.ai/

Either, or

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 2, 2023, In : Humor

My choice early in lei was either to be a piano player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference.
-- Harry S. Truman

Website 4 the day:

Pathways to a language model (PaLM):
https://ai.googleblog.com/2022/04/pathways-language-model-palm-scaling-to.html

When it is a dad joke

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

A joke doesn't become a dad joke until it's full groan.

Website 4 the day:

Custom cursor:
https://custom-cursor.com/

Lasting

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.
-- Joey Adams

Website 4 the day:

Voice changer:
https://voicechanger.io/

Love like a backache

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.
-- George Burns

Website 4 the day:

Connect with anyone:
https://hunter.io/

Hard work

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Hard work is damn near as overrated as monogamy.
-- Huey Long

Website 4 the day:

Create an AI-generated image:
https://creator.nightcafe.studio/create

Character spotlight

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.
-- Sam Ewing

Website 4 the day:

Scheduling automation:
https://calendly.com/

Everyday was Friday

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Why do people say they wish everyday was Friday? If it was always Friday, we’d be here every freakin’ day.
-- Ed Bernard

Website 4 the day:

Stunning websites:
https://nicepage.com/

An ‘entrepreneur’

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

My son is now an ‘entrepreneur.’ That’s what you’re called when you don’t have a job.
-- Ted Turner

Website 4 the day:

The customer is not always right:
https://notalwaysright.com/

A cow but no milk

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

If a cow doesn't produce milk, is it a milk dud or an udder failure?

Website 4 the day:

Plagarism and AI detector:
https://originality.ai/

Working

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil—and you’ll never get a job working for a tabloid.
-- Phil Pastoret

Website 4 the day:

AI generated text:
https://www.jasper.ai/

Christmas parties

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
-- Phyllis Diller

Website 4 the day:

AI generated text:
https://wordhero.co/

A smiling man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Paraphraser:
https://quillbot.com/

Lettered people

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. Unfortunately, they don’t have a J.O.B.
-- Fats Domino

Website 4 the day:

Tour abandoned city hall:
https://www.thetravel.com/tour-abandoned-city-hall-station-by-foot-with-this-guide/

Checking out my dog

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

The vet is checking out my dog, who swallowed scrabble tiles. No word yet.

Website 4 the day:

Free art:
https://dataconomy.com/2022/12/best-free-ai-art-generators-images-trend/

Sat its way to success

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.
-- Sarah Brown

Website 4 the day:

Websites that track your data:
https://www.saymine.com/

A friend of the working man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

I am a friend of the working man, and I would rather be his friend, than be one.
-- Clarence Darrow

Website 4 the day:

Sounds to work and relax:
https://www.noisli.com/

Reality

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Reality is the most difficult tea to swallow.

Website 4 the day:

Edible and poisonous mushrooms:
https://www.themanual.com/food-and-drink/types-of-mushrooms-you-can-eat/

Laughing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can shorten it.
-- Cullen Hightower

Website 4 the day:

Airline reviews by passengers:
https://datascalp.com/

If at first you don’t succeed ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 3, 2023, In : Humor

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
-- W. C. Fields

Website 4 the day:

AI chatbot:
https://openai.com/blog/chatgpt/

A car out of spaghetti

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

My girlfriend thought I'd never be able to make a car out of spaghetti… You should've seen her face when I drove pasta!

Website 4 the day:

Antique machines:
https://www.officemuseum.com/

DeBeers

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

DeBeers should change it’s motto to ‘Diamonds – that’ll shut her up… for a minute!’
-- Ron White

Website 4 the day:

Museum of radiation:
https://www.orau.org/health-physics-museum/

It is interesting

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

I think it is interesting that cologne rhymes with alone
-- Demetri Martin

Website 4 the day:

Create a blob opera:
https://artsandculture.google.com/experiment/blob-opera/AAHWrq360NcGbw?hl=en

Marriage is like mushrooms

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Match the color:
https://color.method.ac/

Not for everyone

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

I’m not for everyone. I’m barely for me.
-- Marc Maron

Website 4 the day:

Robots revealed:
https://mattkirkland.com/ursum/

All my cash

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

I put all my cash into an origami business. But it folded.

Website 4 the day:

Card trick:
https://www.crazycardtrick.com/

When all else fails

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

When all else fails, there's always delusion.
-- Conan O'Brien

Website 4 the day:

Frogs:
https://froggytime.com/

Happiness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

Happiness is a dry martini and a good woman… or a bad woman.
-- George Burns

Website 4 the day:

Take me back:
https://takemeback.to/

Schedule

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.
-- Charles Lamb

Website 4 the day:

Morse code translator:
https://morsecode.world/international/translator.html

Staying young

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
-- Lucille Ball

Website 4 the day:

An AI creates stories:
https://toolbaz.com/writer/ai-story-generator

Talked about

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Antidepressant drum or a Tolkein character?
https://antidepressantsortolkien.vercel.app/

Cloning

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

A friend said he didn’t understand cloning. I told him that makes two of us.

Website 4 the day:

Rude places on the map:
https://www.vaguelyrudeplacesmap.com/

To make a long story short ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, December 3, 2022, In : Humor

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.
-- Don Herold

Website 4 the day:

Beat box:
https://adventuremachine.4thfloorcreative.co.uk/adventuremachine/

High heels

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.
-- Christopher Morley

Website 4 the day:

End of the internet:
https://hmpg.net/

Turtle communication

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

Turtles communicate with each other using shell phones.

Website 4 the day:

Search Tor sites:
http://6pxxjp7l2fervwwxiwr7kkheoed2gch6c2kkpionsjckk2molias2cad.onion/ (have to use Tor)

See your money

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.
-- Sarah Jessica Parker

Website 4 the day:

Search Tor sites:
http://torchdeedp3i2jigzjdmfpn5ttjhthh5wbmda2rr3jvqjg5p77c54dqd.onion/ (have to use Tor)

Not stupid

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!
-- Jamie Lee Curtis

Website 4 the day:

Search Tor sites:
http://haystak5njsmn2hqkewecpaxetahtwhsbsa64jom2k22z5afxhnpxfid.onion/ (have to use Tor)

Hold onto a glass!

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

When I'm in social situations, I always hold onto my glass. It makes me feel comfortable and secure and I don't have to shake hands.
-- Larry David

Website 4 the day:

Search Tor sites:
https://onionlandsearchengine.com/

Not good at advice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

I’m not good at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
-- Matthew Perry

Website 4 the day:

Search libraries:
https://www.worldcat.org/

Plastic surgery and sushi

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.
-- Graham Norton

Website 4 the day:

Fix Windows:
https://www.xda-developers.com/passfab-fixuwin-windows-10-11-repair/

Stick shift

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

I wanted to learn to drive a stick shift but I couldn’t find a manual.

Website 4 the day:

3D models:
https://3dmdb.com/

Alligators

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.
-- Adam Sandler

Website 4 the day:

Arc browser:
https://arc.net/

Truth hurts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

Truth hurts. Maybe not as much as jumping on a bicycle with a seat missing, but it hurts.
-- Leslie Nielsen

Website 4 the day:

Fix blurry photos:
https://app.remini.ai/

What is wrong?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

There’s nothing wrong with you that an expensive operation can’t prolong.
-- Graham Chapman

Website 4 the day:

Free TV and movies:
https://www.ustvnow.com/

Advice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.
-- Erma Bombeck

Website 4 the day:

Plant-based recipes:
https://plantbasedcookingshow.com/

Shopping season

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

Halloween is the beginning of the holiday shopping season. That’s for women. The beginning of the holiday shopping season for men is Christmas Eve.
-- David Letterman

Website 4 the day:

Free books:
https://www.pdfbooksworld.com/

What my mother said

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, December 2, 2022, In : Humor

My mother always used to say: The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.
-- Betty White

Website 4 the day:

Google killed these:
https://killedbygoogle.com/

Flea creation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

Scientists have created a flea from scratch.

Website 4 the day:

Ancient history:
https://www.worldhistory.org/

Accumulating possessions

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Hand-picked movies:
https://mubi.com/

Food like sex

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

Food is like sex: When you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good.
-- Beth McCollister

Website 4 the day:

Songs that Spotify forgot:
https://forgotify.com/

Why I don't weigh

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.
-- Matt Bellassai

Website 4 the day:

The sound of rain:
https://www.rainymood.com/

Body shamed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.
-- Danny Zuker

Website 4 the day:

How a car works:
https://www.howacarworks.com/

Remixed a remix

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Play retro games:
https://myemulator.online/

Not a doctor

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 8, 2022, In : Humor

I'm not a doctor but I'm losing my patience.

Website 4 the day:

What browsers know:
https://webkay.robinlinus.com/

Sleeping attorney

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 3, 2022, In : Humor

How does an attorney sleep? First, he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

Website 4 the day:

Documentation of memes:
https://knowyourmeme.com/

Aquatic mammals escaped

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 3, 2022, In : Humor

Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos!

Website 4 the day:

How many people are there?
https://worldpopulationreview.com/

Dove chocolate

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 13, 2022, In : Humor

Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

Website 4 the day:

Compare saving accounts:
https://www.apy.fyi/

Just stand up

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 13, 2022, In : Humor

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it.
-- Dylan Moran

Website 4 the day:

Make an image (was Dalle):
https://www.craiyon.com/

Created equal

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 13, 2022, In : Humor

All men are equal before fish.
-- Herbert Hoover

Website 4 the day:

Business name generator:
https://namelix.com/

high-voltage fence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 13, 2022, In : Humor

I put up a high-voltage electric fence around my property over the weekend, my neighbor is dead against it.

Website 4 the day:

Make beautiful presentations:
https://www.beautiful.ai/

A man should be ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.
-- E.W. Howe

Website 4 the day:

How old are your ears?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYRxqKhNUUA

Sexy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

I put the sexy in dyslexia.
-- Mariah Gonzales

Website 4 the day:

Search engine lets you refine your search:
https://www.occamm.com/

You wonder sometimes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

You wonder sometimes how our government puts on its pants in the morning.
-- Jon Stewart

Website 4 the day:

Power Automate for WIndows:
https://docs.microsoft.com/en-us/power-automate/desktop-flows/install

Hollywood

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom.
-- Candice Bergen

Website 4 the day:

A dark room:
https://adarkroom.doublespeakgames.com/

Missing pills

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

Weight loss pills stolen this morning - police say suspects are still at large.

Website 4 the day:

Search blogs:
https://blogsurf.io/

Coffee!

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

People don't seem as annoying when I've got coffee.
-- Tommy Cotton

Website 4 the day:

Internet-radio recorder:
https://streamwriter.org/en/

Offence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

Nothing offended me except for cauliflower and stupidity.
-- Abby Jimenez

Website 4 the day:

Open source video transcoder:
https://handbrake.fr/downloads.php

So high

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

I was so high, I needed a stepladder to scratch my own ass.
-- Kinky Friedman

Website 4 the day:

How many parts can you take off a car?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfkMTg4Bh0k

Admitting ignorance

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

"I hate to admit my ignorance," said Nikolai. "It's so much more fun for people to discover it on their own.
-- Leigh Bardugo

Website 4 the day:

Open source TeamViewer alternative:
https://rustdesk.com/

A loser

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

Yes, I may be a loser, but I'm the best dam loser you'll ever meet.
-- Osamu Dazai

Website 4 the day:

Tools for better thinking:
https://untools.co/

Even on mute

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

Even on mute, the news is too loud.
-- Daksh Tyagi

Website 4 the day:

Search historical newspapers:
http://vlib.org/

By shear coincidence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

By shear coincidence, all these sheep look the same.

Website 4 the day:

Why woodpeckers don't get concussions:
https://www.cell.com/current-biology/fulltext/S0960-9822(22)00855-7

Love is a fire

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.
-- Joan Crawford

Website 4 the day:

What is that thing?
https://experiments.withgoogle.com/thing-translator

Past and the future

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

It’s okay to look at the past and the future. Just don’t stare.
-- Lisa Lieberman-Wang

Website 4 the day:

AI companion:
https://replika.com/

My ability

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne.
-- Tina Fey

Website 4 the day:

Alternate phrasing:
https://www.wordtune.com/

When he is wise enough

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, October 6, 2022, In : Humor

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.
-- Billy Crystal

Website 4 the day:

Free Windows download manager:
https://www.freedownloadmanager.org/

Derailments as a train driver

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

I can't remember how many derailments I had as a train driver. It is just so hard to keep track.

Website 4 the day:

AI writing partner:
https://www.shortlyai.com/

Your porpoise

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.
-- Ashleigh Brilliant

Website 4 the day:

The German campaign in Russia:
https://history.army.mil/html/books/104/104-22-1/CMH_Pub_104-22-1.pdf

When in doubt

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

When in doubt, look intelligent.
-- Garrison Keillor

Website 4 the day:

Review of 25 VPNs:
https://www.tomsguide.com/news/weve-just-finished-re-reviewing-over-25-vpns-here-are-the-ones-to-watch

I never forget a face

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

I never forget a face—but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Create a website from your phone:
https://mssg.me/

If you don't know

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.
-- Yogi Berra

Website 4 the day:

Repair Windows:
https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/download/windows-repair-all-in-one/

A nonconformist hates worse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it’s another nonconformist who doesn’t conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity.
-- Bill Vaughan

Website 4 the day:

Compress images:
https://tinypng.com/

Avoidance of taxes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that still carries any reward.
-- John Maynard Keynes

Website 4 the day:

Remove from images:
https://www.magiceraser.io/

The early bird

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Audio/video editor:
https://www.descript.com/

Confusion

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

I told you to go to Cox’s and buy a searsucker suit, but it looks like you went to Sears instead.
-- Jay Shulte

Website 4 the day:

Update WIndows drivers:
https://sdi-tool.org/

You who received honors

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 20, 2022, In : Humor

To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I say you, too, can be president of the United States.
-- George W. Bush

Website 4 the day:

Fix Windows problems free:
https://www.thewindowsclub.com/fixwin-for-windows-10

Nothing goes right

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 13, 2022, In : Humor

When nothing goes right, go left instead.

Website 4 the day:

Movie quotes:
https://www.quodb.com/

Happy marriage secret

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 13, 2022, In : Humor

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
-- Henny Youngman

Website 4 the day:

Making of a Russian hacker:
https://linkslist.app/77KhuWk

God and religion

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 13, 2022, In : Humor

God did not intend religion to be an exercise club.
-- Naguib Mahfouz

Website 4 the day:

Free online PDF tools:
https://www.ilovepdf.com/

The Supreme Court Ruling

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 13, 2022, In : Humor

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.
-- Jay Leno

Website 4 the day:

Raw image processing:
https://www.rawtherapee.com/

Everyone talks about the weather

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 13, 2022, In : Humor

Everyone talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.
-- Charles Dudley Warner

Website 4 the day:

Photo Editor. Collage Maker. Graphic Designer:
https://ipiccy.com/

We had Johnny Cash ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 13, 2022, In : Humor

Twenty years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

AI photo editor:
https://www.autoenhance.ai/

Compulsive talker self-help

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

There is a new self-help group for compulsive talkers. It's called On and On Anon.

Website 4 the day:

Cat feeder:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Q_sebGRkAM

Facebook sounds like a drag

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment.
-- Betty White

Website 4 the day:

Hello quantum:
https://helloquantum.mybluemix.net/

Racism isn't born

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

Racism isn't born, folks, it's taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps. End of list.
-- Denis Leary

Website 4 the day:

AI helps you write:
https://www.copy.ai/

Dogs and cats

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

A new report says that dogs can sniff out prostate cancer with almost 98 percent accuracy. The report also finds that cats can sniff it out with 100 percent accuracy, but they prefer to watch you die.
-- Conan O’Brien

Website 4 the day:

Free video assets:
https://mixkit.co/

Country music

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for those who like country music, denigrate means to 'put down.'
-- Bob Newhart

Website 4 the day:

Make a profile picture:
https://pfpmaker.com/

Money is not the key

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.
-- Joan Rivers

Website 4 the day:

Public domain 3D assets:
https://polyhaven.com/

The circus hasn't left

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 9, 2022, In : Humor

Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn’t mean the circus has left town.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Reverse phone number lookup:
https://www.numlookup.com/

Trusting a train

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Why should you never trust a train? They have loco motives.

Website 4 the day:

Making Roman roads:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1aFWtBXHII

Smart vs. bright

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

A man who correctly guesses a woman's age may be smart, but he's not very bright.
-- Lucille Ball

Website 4 the day:

Store and share text:
https://www.protectedtext.com/

Lord's preference

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

The Lord prefers common-looking people. That is why he made so many of them.
-- Abraham Lincoln

Website 4 the day:

Archive of web pages:
http://timetravel.mementoweb.org/

Aging

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

It is sad to grow old but nice to ripen.
-- Brigitte Bardot

Website 4 the day:

Open access and peer-reviewed journals:
https://www.arjonline.org/

Everything is changing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

You are not where you think you are:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pj-h6MEgE7I

Happy frogs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.

Website 4 the day:

An inconvenient convenience store:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gvp32W1K2Vc

Life like a bike

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Life is like a ten-speed bike. Most of us have gears we never use.
-- Charles M. Schulz

Website 4 the day:

Radare2 for reverse engineering:
https://itnext.io/radare2-for-reverse-engineering-part1-eedf0a47b5cc

Laughter

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Visually diff binary files:
https://www.cjmweb.net/vbindiff/

A synonym

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the word you first thought of.
-- Burt Bacharach

Website 4 the day:

Raising the roof and the rest of the theater as well:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnIcCQR551o

Nursery rhyme crime

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Humpty Dumpty was pushed!
-- Elisabeth Richards

Website 4 the day:

The last train robbery:
https://medium.com/truly-adventurous/the-last-train-robbery-15d19d3ea47e

Coin factory problem

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

The machine at the coin factory just suddenly stopped working, with no explanation. It doesn’t make any cents.

Website 4 the day:

The Hidden Wiki (use the Tor browser):
http://zqktlwiuavvvqqt4ybvgvi7tyo4hjl5xgfuvpdf6otjiycgwqbym2qad.onion/wiki/index.php/Main_Page

Order is important

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
-- Peyton Johnston

Website 4 the day:

Windows 11 on a VM:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/try-latest-windows/

Piano notes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

The piano ain't got no wrong notes.

-- Thelonious Monk

Website 4 the day:

Research phone numbers:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CnDdXVTxhU

Sports

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Sports are the reason I am out of shape. I watch them all on TV.
-- Thomas Sowell

Website 4 the day:

Images from prompts:
https://huggingface.co/spaces/dalle-mini/dalle-mini

Be yourself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

“Be yourself” is about the worst advice you can give some people.
-- Thomas Lansing Masson

Website 4 the day:

Publically available scientific papers:
https://libgen.li/

Heart attack timing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
-- Demetri Martin

Website 4 the day:

Report food safety issues:
https://iwaspoisoned.com/

What a judge is

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.
-- H. L. Mencken

Website 4 the day:

Most popular websites since 1993:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNDILCdZmRo

Ability to fly

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.

Website 4 the day:

Pluto images:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5XPuS-Y0fg

I wish I were dumber

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

I wish I were dumber so I could be more certain about my opinions. It looks fun.
-- Scott Adams

Website 4 the day:

Origins of the Black Death:
https://www.usnews.com/news/health-news/articles/2022-06-15/scientists-pinpoint-origins-of-the-black-death

A fool and his money

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

A fool and his money never should have got together in the first place.
-- Michael Douglas

Website 4 the day:

Modern alternatives to classic Linux apps:
https://www.makeuseof.com/linux-commands-and-alternatives/

Money and happiness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop.
-- Gertrude Stein

Website 4 the day:

BBC sound effects library:
https://sound-effects.bbcrewind.co.uk/

The forces of evil

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Control Androids from a computer:
https://9to5google.com/2018/03/09/how-to-control-android-phone-from-computer-scrcpy-android-basics/

Small talk

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

I’m trying to elevate small talk to medium talk.
-- Larry David

Website 4 the day:

Websites and apps from spreadsheets:
https://www.producthunt.com/products/sheetbase-2

The world needs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.
-- Pearl S. Bailey

Website 4 the day:

Android app tutorial:
https://www.udemy.com/course/become-an-android-developer-from-scratch

Long fairy tales

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.

Website 4 the day:

Drinking diet coke:
https://www.the-sun.com/health/1341600/minute-by-minute-what-happens-body-drink-diet-coke/

Road to success

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Rome's last stand:
https://digg.com/video/heres-a-deeply-fascinating-breakdown-of-the-siege-of-rome-that-your-history-teachers-never-told-you-about

Design of a camel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

A camel is a horse designed by a committee.
-- Sir Alec Issigonis

Website 4 the day:

Watch videos together:
http://twoseven.xyz

Don’t trust stairs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something.

Website 4 the day:

Mysterious codes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D00u2Bj9Dr8

Heaven and hell

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell — you see, I have friends in both places.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Leonardo's To-Do List:
https://www.npr.org/sections/krulwich/2011/11/18/142467882/leonardos-to-do-list

Give up integrity

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

Once you give up integrity, the rest is a piece of cake.
-- J.R. Ewing

Website 4 the day:

A placebo can work even when you know it’s a placebo:
https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/placebo-can-work-even-know-placebo-201607079926

To err is human

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 28, 2022, In : Humor

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.
– Paul Ehrlich

Website 4 the day:

Famous hackers:
https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/5-of-the-worlds-most-famous-hackers-what-happened-to-them

Cowboy apparel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

If you wear cowboy apparel, is it called ranch dressing?

Website 4 the day:

Free Windows software:
https://www.filepuma.com/

Abuse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.
-- Dr. Peter Venkman

Website 4 the day:

Cryptocurrency is bad:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9nv0Ol-R5Q

Interview advice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

Here’s some advice: At a job interview, tell them you’re willing to give 110 percent. Unless the job is a statistician.
-- Adam Gropman

Website 4 the day:

Quantum computing map:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UlxHPIEVqA

Middle age

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

You know you’ve reached middle age when you’re cautioned to slow down by your doctor, instead of by the police.
-- Joan Rivers

Website 4 the day:

Python for microcontrollers:
https://circuitpython.org/

Instead of the mahi mahi

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

Instead of the mahi mahi, may I just get the one mahi because I’m not that hungry?
-- Shelley Darlingson

Website 4 the day:

US Army military history:
https://history.army.mil/

Giant fear

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I have a fear of giants. It's called feefiphobia.

Website 4 the day:

If Apple made window blinds:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hv6EMd8dlQk

Free air

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips
-- Priyanshu Singh

Website 4 the day:

Numbers to words:
https://number-word.calculators.ro/

Mr. Right is coming

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

Mr. Right is coming. But He’s in Africa and he’s walking.
-- Oprah Winfrey

Website 4 the day:

Search XKCD comics:
https://findxkcd.com/

Two tragedies

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Answers to your dreams:
http://www.dreambible.com/

A girl like you

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I’ve been looking for a girl like you – not you, but a girl like you.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Hanger Reflex:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=on22yoI40TI

Education compensation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

GoPro on a turtle:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYfpcX9DPFw

Coming home at night

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who’ll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you’re in the wrong house.
-- Henny Youngman

Website 4 the day:

Rude comments about your password:
https://trypap.com/

Outperforming inflation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

With inflation at 7.5%, you lose half your money in 9 years. The only way to outperform that consistently, that I have found, is crypto. Just this year I've already lost half my money.

Website 4 the day:

Public datasets and analysis code:
https://www.kaggle.com/

Make God laugh

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

How to make God laugh: Tell him your future plans.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

NASCAR pit stop:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7J1ICj1zeE

I don’t like myself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I don’t like myself, I’m crazy about myself.
--The only power you have is the word Mae West

Website 4 the day:

Photorealistic images from text:
https://imagen.research.google/

Simply a shiver

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.
-- Paul Keating

Website 4 the day:

Write better English:
https://ludwig.guru/

Virtues and vices

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
-- Winston Churchill

Website 4 the day:

Watch old-time cartoons:
https://www.topcartoons.tv/

Delusions

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

He had delusions of adequacy.
-- Walter Kerr

Website 4 the day:

Clubbing in the wild:
https://youtu.be/q8zwIphm5r4

A self-made man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

He is a self-made man & worships his creator.
-- John Bright

Website 4 the day:

50,000 free e-books:
http://manybooks.net/

Hide and seek with mates

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

When I play hide and seek with my mates, the games go on for hours. Good friends are hard to find.

Website 4 the day:

Top-rated places:
https://www.top-rated.online/

Good instincts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them.
-- James Reston

Website 4 the day:

Create customized maps:
https://ezmap.co/

Miserable without you

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here.
-- Stephen Bishop

Website 4 the day:

Decentralized search engine:
https://presearch.com/

Darkest before the dawn

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

It’s always darkest before the dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
-- Navjot Singh Sidhu

Website 4 the day:

Giant mechanical elephant:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSg3T0aK-ck

A lie detector test

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I took a lie detector test. No I didn't.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Free web proxy:
https://www.proxysite.com/

Hurling a computer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 27, 2022, In : Humor

I hurled this computer to its doom from atop National’s 3-story parking garage. As the dust settled, I knew that computer would never lie to me again!
-- Bob Pease

Website 4 the day:

Free movies on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/c/MovieCentral

Books in the sun

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.

Website 4 the day:

Inside a mechanical watch:
https://ciechanow.ski/mechanical-watch/

Repeating history

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

History repeats itself; historians repeat one another.
-- Robert Brooke

Website 4 the day:

3D-printable “Oreometer:
https://news.mit.edu/2022/oreometer-cream-0419

Not to worry

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Sometimes you lie in bed at night and you don’t have a single thing to worry about. That always worries me!
-- Charlie Brown

Website 4 the day:

Harvard Intro to Programming with Python:
https://www.edx.org/course/cs50s-introduction-to-programming-with-python

What my wife likes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

My wife likes it when I blow air on her when she's hot, but honestly... I'm not a fan.

Website 4 the day:

A business tries to legally kill their customers:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pv7wIAMq3TE

No bank account

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

I don’t have a bank account because I don’t know my mother’s maiden name.
-- Paula Poundstone

Website 4 the day:

Sea stars:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZ20KsgVeu0

Who is an expert?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
-- Laurence J. Peter

Website 4 the day:

How memorable is an image?
https://brainbridgelab.uchicago.edu/resmem/

Great time saver

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Prejudice is a great time saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts.
-- E. B. White

Website 4 the day:

A year of a Kestrel couple:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kQb-badp1s

Spending $20

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

If you loan someone $20 and you never see them again because they are avoiding paying you back, that makes it worth $20.
-- Kevin Kelly

Website 4 the day:

Make illustrations:
https://blush.design/

Surprised wife

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

When I surprised my wife by replacing our bed with a trampoline; she hit the roof.

Website 4 the day:

How ants respond to chili sauce:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUJk7rDaGqE

Colorful dreaming

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.

Website 4 the day:

Pet the cat:
https://www.activitysuggestion.com/

The same mistakes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Don't keep making the same mistakes; try to make new mistakes.
-- Kevin Kelly

Website 4 the day:

Find open-source projects:
https://awesomeopensource.com/

Personal pizza

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Any pizza can be a personal pizza if you have the right attitude.
-- Marty Allen

Website 4 the day:

Cat year calculator:
https://miniwebtool.com/cat-years-calculator/

The curse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Pinouts:
https://pinouts.org/

A terrible thing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

A waist is a terrible thing to mind.
-- Karen Scalf Linamen

Website 4 the day:

Compare two sets of text:
https://text-compare.com/

Lemons to lemonade

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 2, 2022, In : Humor

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade… And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
-- Ron White

Website 4 the day:

Curves and surfaces:
https://ciechanow.ski/curves-and-surfaces/

New car

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

I bought a car covered in red and yellow leaves. It's an autumnobile.

Website 4 the day:

The stenograph:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UA6UythLlEI

Top of the food chain

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

I did not climb to the top of the food chain to eat carrots.
-- Ron White

Website 4 the day:

Selling the Eiffel Tower:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mVdxtLXhsg

Directions

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

I live about four muggings from Central Park.
-- Henny Youngman

Website 4 the day:

Old electronics:
https://oldcrap.org/

Not the dog's size

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the dog’s owner – and the distance you are from your car.
-- Demetri Martin

Website 4 the day:

Emulation of old web browsers:
https://oldweb.today/

Love conquers

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.
-- Mae West

Website 4 the day:

CIA rectal tool kit:
https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/cia-issued-rectal-tool-kit

Can't fix it

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

You can't fix stupid.
-- Ron White

Website 4 the day:

Private search:
https://search.brave.com/

Health nuts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
-- Redd Foxx

Website 4 the day:

1+1=2:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysNyWFQstto

Coded apology

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

I received an apology written in dots and dashes. It was in re-morse code.

Website 4 the day:

Compare specs of two phones or tablets:
http://gsmversus.com/

The internet

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom.
-- Jon Stewart

Website 4 the day:

Single-cell into a full newt:
https://digg.com/video/cell-division-time-lapse

Miserable golfer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

If I wasn’t a golfer, I would still be miserable – but not as miserable.
-- Larry David

Website 4 the day:

How do design a logo:
https://www.creativebloq.com/graphic-design/pro-guide-logo-design-21221

Great taste

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

If someone else is paying for it, food just tastes a lot better.
-- Gilbert Gottfried

Website 4 the day:

Find shows to watch:
https://likewisetv.com/

Complain about men

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
-- Bill Maher

Website 4 the day:

How to be a cat in ancient Egypt:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlK16lzyySU

Lovers are the best friends

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man’s best friend is his dog.
-- Jay Leno

Website 4 the day:

Conway's Game of Life:
https://playgameoflife.com/

A scientific fact

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate.
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Synchronicity:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-_VPRCtiUg

Cabbage and celery

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

A cabbage and celery walk into a bar and the cabbage gets served first because he was a head.

Website 4 the day:

Search the 1950's census:
https://1950census.archives.gov/search/

Everything is funny

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Latecomers' guide to crypto:
https://www.mollywhite.net/annotations/latecomers-guide-to-crypto

He knows

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

He knows nothing; he thinks he knows everything – that clearly points to a political career.
-- George Bernard Shaw

Website 4 the day:

New old stock photos:
https://nos.twnsnd.co/

Only human

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

I am only human, although I regret it.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Free photos:
https://burst.shopify.com/

God's teachings

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
-- Ambrose Pierce

Website 4 the day:

Search creative commons images:
https://wordpress.org/openverse/

Top shelf meat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

The butcher couldn't reach the meat that was on the top shelf. The steaks were too high.

Website 4 the day:

Air quality map:
https://map.purpleair.com/

Considering Mozart

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

It is sobering to consider that when Mozart was my age he had already been dead for a year.
-- Tom Lehrer

Website 4 the day:

Is it Friday yet?
http://isitfridayyet.net/

Can't communicate

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

If a person feels he can't communicate, the least he can do is shut up about it.
-- Tom Lehrer

Website 4 the day:

Sand spiel:
http://sandspiel.club

Love high school,

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

I loved high school, but I wouldn't want to do it again.
-- Tom Lehrer

Website 4 the day:

Find similar movies:
https://bestsimilar.com/

Centipede X parrot

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 29, 2022, In : Humor

What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot? A walkie-talkie.

Website 4 the day:

Online paint app:
https://jspaint.app/

When Mozart was my age

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, April 28, 2022, In : Humor

It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years.
-- Tom Lehrer

Website 4 the day:

Waveform drawing tool:
https://wavedrom.com/

Inventing the wheel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, April 28, 2022, In : Humor

The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius.
-- Sid Caesar

Website 4 the day:

5,000 exoplanets:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOwI3nTAHIc

Feeding babies

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, April 28, 2022, In : Humor

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Create unique email addresses:
https://meandmyid.com/

Three kinds of men

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, April 28, 2022, In : Humor

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Windows10Debloater:
https://github.com/Sycnex/Windows10Debloater

How an attorney sleeps

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

How does an attorney sleep? First, he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.

Website 4 the day:

Public domain movies:
https://www.publicdomaintorrents.info/

A benefit of hermiting

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

Hermits have no peer pressure.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Grab text from images:
https://projectnaptha.com/

Easy crocodiles

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you. People are harder. Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first.
-- Steve Irwin

Website 4 the day:

Clean up your inbox:
https://mailstrom.co/

So cute

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

That's so cute! They have birdbaths in the church!
-- Hilary Duff

Website 4 the day:

Vectorize an image:
https://vectormagic.com/

Fun and games

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye. Then it's fun and games you can't see anymore.
-- James Hetfield

Website 4 the day:

Free images:
https://www.freeimages.com/

Misspelled word

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know?
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Wind map of the earth:
https://earth.nullschool.net/

Broken finger

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

Jill broke her right index finger today, but on the other hand, she was completely fine

Website 4 the day:

Translate english words for European countries:
https://ukdataexplorer.com/european-translator/

Preferred writers

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

I prefer dead writers because you don't run into them at parties.
-- Fran Lebowitz

Website 4 the day:

Build habits:
https://habitica.com/static/front

Excellent advice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

I sometimes give myself excellent advice. Occasionally, I even listen to it.
-- Jim Butcher

Website 4 the day:

Online game:
https://www.poptropica.com/

A perfect rule

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

List of individual dogs:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_individual_dogs

A split personality

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

"I have a split personality," said Tom, being frank.

Website 4 the day:

Chrome extension for geo-unblocking:
https://www.streamlocator.com/browser

Fortified friendships

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

Nothing so fortifies a friendship as a belief on the part of one friend that he is superior to the other.
-- Honore de Balzac

Website 4 the day:

Hall and Oates help line:
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/hall-oates-phone-hotline/

What we want

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

WHAT DO WE WANT?! PATIENCE! WHEN DO WE WANT IT?! NOW!
-- Al Franken

Website 4 the day:

Ethonol fuel was dumb:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-yDKeya4SU

A bureaucratic organization

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

The behavior of any bureaucratic organization can best be understood by assuming that it is controlled by a secret cabal of its enemies.
-- Robert Conquest

Website 4 the day:

Midi piano speaks English:
https://digg.com/video/mark-rober-figures-out-how-to-get-this-midi-controlled-piano-to-perfectly-play-the-worlds-hardest-song

A life goal

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

My goal in life is to have a psychiatric disorder named after me.
-- Darynda Jones

Website 4 the day:

Inside a dishwasher:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkJJSsmAdDY

Albert Einstein's theories

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

In the early 1900s Albert Einstein developed theories about space. And it was about time.

Website 4 the day:

Vacuum tubes' rival:
https://spectrum.ieee.org/the-vacuum-tubes-forgotten-rival

A hospital bed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

How to mix oil and water
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YJeWklggSpY

Going to hell

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

I'm bad and I'm going to hell, and I don't care. I'd rather be in hell than anywhere where you are.
-- William Faulkner

Website 4 the day:

Product scans:
https://www.scanofthemonth.com/

Nothing on

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 31, 2022, In : Humor

It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.
-- Marilyn Monroe

Website 4 the day:

Etymology of first names:
https://www.behindthename.com/

The only naked one

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

Why am I the only naked person at this gender reveal party?

Website 4 the day:

Storing potatoes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4irBRuVU3I

Odd poker

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Financial advisors:
https://smartasset.com/

Lego's customers

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

Lego store re-opens after lockdown and folks were lined up for blocks.

Website 4 the day:

Painter's paradox:
https://youtu.be/3WVpOXUXNXQ

Thieving ancestors

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

Confound these ancestors.... They've stolen our best ideas!
-- Ben Jonson

Website 4 the day:

Throwing balls on other worlds:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zyn4KGxku90

Very difficult

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.
-- Niels Bohr

Website 4 the day:

Strip out just the recipe:
https://www.justtherecipe.com/

Strong snowman

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.

Website 4 the day:

Terms of service:
https://tosdr.org/

The past

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

Whenever I think of the past it brings back so many memories.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

12 useful knots:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5P9awFq3cgI

Dental X-rays

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

Another phrase for dental X-rays could be "tooth pics."

Website 4 the day:

100 facts about earth:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFDhOy2qVgE

Picture postcard

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

My brother sent me a postcard the other day with this big satellite photo of the entire earth on it. On the back it said: Wish you were here.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Why a pentagon?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FqfopuQJtY8

Give me a sign

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 1, 2022, In : Humor

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss Bank.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Planets visible tonight:
https://www.almanac.com/astronomy/planets-rise-and-set

Recipe for a chuckle

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 3, 2022, In : Humor

If you boil a funny bone you get a laughing stock.

Website 4 the day:

Game rules:
https://gamerules.com/

That joke was rich

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 3, 2022, In : Humor

A rich man's joke is always funny.
-- Thomas Edward Brown

Website 4 the day:

Coupons on Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/Coupons

Sorry circumstances

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 3, 2022, In : Humor

I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry.
-- Norman Wisdom

Website 4 the day:

Mythbusters for the impatient:
https://www.youtube.com/c/MythbustersImpatient

Every dogman

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 3, 2022, In : Humor

Every dogman has its day.
-- Anthony Burgess

Website 4 the day:

Independent search engine:
https://www.mojeek.com/

A handsome woman

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

She was a handsome woman of forty-five and would remain so for many years.
-- J. B. Priestley

Website 4 the day:

Literature clock:
https://literature-clock.jenevoldsen.com/

Well informed men

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

You can always tell when a man's well informed. His views are pretty much like your own.
-- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Website 4 the day:

Mickey Mouse in Viet Nam (1960's short):
https://youtu.be/JOiKgrSUWWk

Writing a book

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I am writing a book about all the things I should be doing in my life. It's an oughtobiography.

Website 4 the day:

AI breaks NES Tetris:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_KY_EwZEVA

Sunburned locations

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

How DuPont poisoned the world:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pW2ATrDnA8

Live my life over

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
-- W. C. Fields

Website 4 the day:

Create virtual machines fast:
https://itsfoss.com/quickgui/

A stationery store

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I saw a stationery store move.
-- Jay London

Website 4 the day:

Dementia test:
https://wexnermedical.osu.edu/brain-spine-neuro/memory-disorders/sage#SAGETest

In the army

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
-- Spike Milligan

Website 4 the day:

Logos, logos, logos:
https://1000logos.net/

Yield to temptation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

Yield to temptation. I may not pass your way again.
-- Robert A. Heinlein

Website 4 the day:

Useful Windows CMD tools:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/20-run-commands-windows

Hiding elephants

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

Why do you never see elephants hiding behind trees? They’re so good at it.

Website 4 the day:

Statue of Liberty's torch:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ybKILVz2Xc

Rules

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I believe in rules. Sure I do. If there weren't any rules, how could you break them?
-- Leo Durocher

Website 4 the day:

Machine ethics demo:
https://delphi.allenai.org/

Leading to Congress

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.
-- Milton Berle

Website 4 the day:

Biking on a wind turbine blade:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XR4maEf-eCY

Window shopping

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I went window shopping today! I bought four windows.
-- Tommy Cooper

Website 4 the day:

What time is it at:
https://timezone.fyi/

Love changes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby—awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.
-- Lemony Snicket

Website 4 the day:

Top websites:
https://www.semrush.com/website/top

Clover and ivy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I mixed a four-leaf clover with poison ivy and got a rash of good luck.

Website 4 the day:

Inventors whose inventions killed them:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4LhsiI0L9g

Toaster avoidance

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

Never put a sock in a toaster.
-- Eddie Izzard

Website 4 the day:

Toxic sites in the US:
https://projects.propublica.org/toxmap/

Growing up with siblings

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions.
-- Robert Brault

Website 4 the day:

The can opener bridge:
https://11foot8.com/

Less like an adult

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

I like to think of myself less like ‘an adult’ and more like a ‘former fetus.’.
-- Anna Kendrick

Website 4 the day:

Loop a Youtube video:
youtuberepeater.com

Getting old

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
-- Bob Hope

Website 4 the day:

Mix two Youtube videos:
https://youtube-dj.com/

Love is the answer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, February 2, 2022, In : Humor

If love is the answer, can you please rephrase the question?
-- Lily Tomlin

Website 4 the day:

Make and sell NFTs:
https://www.makeuseof.com/how-to-make-sell-nft-art

Writing underwater

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

I have a pen that can write underwater. It can write other words also.

Website 4 the day:

Text-to-speech:
http://www.cross-plus-a.com/balabolka.htm

Marriage like mushrooms

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Cognitive bias codex:
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/65/Cognitive_bias_codex_en.svg

The will of the people

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago we were swept away by the Macarena.
-- Jon Stewart

Website 4 the day:

Prime number calculator:
https://www.calculatorsoup.com/calculators/math/prime-number-calculator.php

Something pops in my head

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

Every time something pops in my head, I think twice about it and I do it anyway.
-- Gilbert Gottfried

Website 4 the day:

Expand shortened URLs:
https://www.expandurl.net/

Reading the Bible

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me – they’re cramming for their final exam.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Search engine with summaries:
https://you.com/

Not bragging, but

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

I don't want to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours.

Website 4 the day:

Find broken web site links:
https://www.brokenlinkcheck.com/

Plastic surgery

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

I had plastic surgery last week – I cut up my credit cards.
-- Henny Youngman

Website 4 the day:

Probability is not always intuitive:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5Kj-XlZoV0&t=451s

Wise poets

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 18, 2022, In : Humor

Poets utter great and wise things which they do not themselves understand.
-- Plato

Website 4 the day:

Carl Sagan explains climate change:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wp-WiNXH6hI

4th Spatial Dimension

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

Felix Klein was a bottle baby.

Website 4 the day:

Audio converter:
https://switch.en.softonic.com/

Do something

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

Somebody has to do something, and it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us.
-- Jerry Garcia

Website 4 the day:

Tire technology:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9aX0vohM_8

Work remaining

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

The remaining work to finish in order to reach your goal increases as the deadline approaches.
-- Boves Theorem

Website 4 the day:

Business name generator:
https://namelix.com/

Gifts of celery

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

Someone keeps sending my celery. I don't know who is stalking me.

Website 4 the day:

Presentation maker:
https://www.beautiful.ai/

Expertise

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field.
-- Niels Bohr

Website 4 the day:

Create podcast interviews:
https://podcastle.ai/

Working for myself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I'm lying.
-- Rita Rudner

Website 4 the day:

Text to speech in the style of famous folks:
https://uberduck.ai

Any amount of work

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn’t the work he’s supposed to be doing at that moment.
-- Robert Benchley

Website 4 the day:

Youtube alternative:
https://odysee.com/

A matter of luck

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 7, 2022, In : Humor

Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure.
-- Earl Wilson

Website 4 the day:

Write faster:
https://rytr.me/

Limo without driver

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

Just spent $300 on a limousine rental and discovered that the fee does not include a driver. Can't believe I've spent all that money and have nothing to chauffeur it.

Website 4 the day:

The country that doesn't exist:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXzhcfYlKFQ

Accomplishing the impossible

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties.
-- Doug Larson

Website 4 the day:

Future underwater views:
https://www.cnn.com/2021/10/12/world/3-degrees-sea-level-rise-climate-central/index.html

Who is stupid?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn’t hire stupid people.
-- Kooper Salmo

Website 4 the day:

Break through paywalls:
https://12ft.io/

A diamond's origin

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.
-- Henry Kissenger

Website 4 the day:

Map distortions:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=blQLjKzZbv4

Glued cards

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

A prankster glued all my playing cards together. I can't deal with this!

Website 4 the day:

Mined metals:
https://elements.visualcapitalist.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/09/all-of-the-metals-one-visualization.html

Tell your boss

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

Tell your boss what you really think about him and the truth shall set you free.
-- Patrick Murray

Website 4 the day:

Online video editor:
https://www.flexclip.com/

Climbing monkeys

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of its behind.
-- Joseph Stilwell

Website 4 the day:

Remove everything but the punctuation:
https://just-the-punctuation.glitch.me/

Workingman's friend

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

I am a friend of the workingman, I would rather be his friend than be one.
Clarence Darrow

Website 4 the day:

Ambient noise generator:
https://neal.fun/ambient-chaos/

Ambition is a poor excuse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.
-- Charlie McCarthy

Website 4 the day:

Earth impact estimator:
https://impact.ese.ic.ac.uk/ImpactEarth/ImpactEffects/

A rainbow's weight

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

How much does a rainbow weigh? Not much, it is pretty light.

Website 4 the day:

Copilot AI pair programmer:
https://copilot.github.com/

Before his time

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

No man goes before his time unless the boss leaves early.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

The Appalachian Trail in 5 minutes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMgcrCdzYlo

Hear/See/Speak

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil and you'll never get a job working for a tabloid.
-- Phil Pastoret

Website 4 the day:

Map of undersea cables:
https://www.vice.com/en/article/akgbea/this-3d-map-of-the-undersea-cables-connecting-the-globe-is-mesmerizing

The key to success

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

If hard work is the key to success, most people would rather pick the lock.
-- Claude McDonald

Website 4 the day:

Free resume templates:
https://www.freesumes.com/free-resume-templates-for-ms-word/

A new pair

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

I bought a new pair of running shoes and haven't seen them since.

Website 4 the day:

Byte archive:
https://vintageapple.org/byte/

Bad insomnia

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

His insomnia was so bad, he couldn't sleep during office hours.
-- Arthur Baer

Website 4 the day:

Slow motion spin art:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9pyKmmF3VM

Battle challenge

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see that you are unarmed.
-- William Shakespeare

Website 4 the day:

Buy government surplus:
https://www.govdeals.com/

If at first ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, December 9, 2021, In : Humor

If at first, you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Product placement:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3l5oEgko6ds

Speedbump fear

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 29, 2021, In : Humor

I have a fear of a speedbump by my home. But I'm slowly getting over it.

Website 4 the day:

Find hidden cameras with your phone:
https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/use-smartphone-detect-hidden-surveillance-cameras/

Too drunk to drive

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 29, 2021, In : Humor

How do you know when you are too drunk to drive? When you swerve to miss a tree then realize it was your air-freshener.
-- Kevin Hart

Website 4 the day:

Read without distractions:
https://outline.com/

Power corrupts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 29, 2021, In : Humor

All power corrupts, but we need electricity.
-- Diana Wynne JonesBlack Holes are where God divided by zero

Website 4 the day:

Internet slang:
https://7esl.com/internet-slang/

Burger vs. steak

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

A burger has less energy than a steak because it’s in its ground state.

Website 4 the day:

Claim this bird:
https://www.windowsfx.org/

No shrink in Hollywood

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

In Hollywood if you don't have a shrink, people think you're crazy.
-- Johnny Carson

Website 4 the day:

Beautiful noise:
https://mynoise.net/

Age anxious

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Online diagram maker:
https://app.diagrams.net/

Getting older

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

As I get older, I just prefer to knit.
-- Tracey Ullman

Website 4 the day:

Preserved ghost towns:
https://www.atlasobscura.com/lists/americas-best-preserved-ghost-towns

Money talks

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

They say money talks, but all mine ever says is 'good-bye sucker.
-- Jill Shalvis

Website 4 the day:

Machine learning in Python:
https://scikit-learn.org/stable/

Roof's cost

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

I complained to my builder about the cost of my roof. I thought it was on the house.

Website 4 the day:

HTML to PDF:
https://wkhtmltopdf.org/

Lead a horse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him participate in synchronized diving.
-- Cuthbert Soup

Website 4 the day:

Planetary ages:
https://www.kamogo.com/2

Make more mistakes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any other invention in human history, with the possible exception of handguns and tequila.
-- Mitch Radcliffe

Website 4 the day:

Run Linux in your browser:
https://bellard.org/jslinux/

Hard to admit

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

It's especially hard to admit that you made a mistake to your parents, because, of course, you know so much more than they do.
-- Sean Cove

Website 4 the day:

Web-based free Photoshop alternative:
https://www.photopea.com/

New skylight

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

I installed a skylight in my apartment...The people who live above me are furious!
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Automated web testing:
https://portswigger.net/burp/communitydownload

Accident with Vicks

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

A truck loaded with Vicks Vapor Rub overturned on the highway. There was no congestion for eight hours.

Website 4 the day:

Search faces:
http://www.pictriev.com/

I had a dream

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

I had a dream about you last night... shortly after I woke up screaming in terror.
-- Amy Summers

Website 4 the day:

Koko couldn't talk:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7wFotDKEF4

Socks and donut holes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

Have you guys ever thought about the fact that socks are like the donut holes of underpants?
-- Travis McElroy

Website 4 the day:

Spy on military bases from space:
https://www.popularmechanics.com/military/research/a37014065/how-to-spy-on-military-bases-use-satellite-imagery

Why dusting?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

“Why is it that when you wipe up dust it's called dusting but when you wipe up a spill it's not called spilling?”
-- Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

Free New Zealand SMS:
https://temp-sms.org/

Would like a kid

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

I’d like to have a kid, but I’m not sure I’m ready to spend 10 years of my life constantly asking someone where his shoes are.
-- Damien Fahey

Website 4 the day:

Find info of those who click on a link:
https://grabify.link/

Money can't buy health

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

Money cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
-- Dorothy Parker

Website 4 the day:

Free undergraduate and advanced degrees:
https://aui.me/

Be proud!

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

Ladies pick funny things to be proud of.
-- Harper Lee

Website 4 the day:

How to get an EDU email:
https://www.saveourschoolsmarch.org/faqs/how-to-get-an-edu-email-address/

Model making

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

I built a model of Mount Everest, and my son asked, 'Is it to scale?' I replied, 'No…it’s to look at.

Website 4 the day:

End harassment:
https://www.ihollaback.org/

Cucumber and pickle

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

It's funny how cucumber water can taste so much better than pickle juice, even though they come from the same source.
-- Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

Hacking autonomous cars:
https://hackernoon.com/how-to-hack-self-driving-cars-vulnerabilities-in-autonomous-vehicles-jh3r37cz

Jewelry

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 2, 2021, In : Humor

Jewelry takes people's minds off your wrinkles.
-- Sarah Phillips

Website 4 the day:

Better headlines:
https://coschedule.com/headline-studio

Humpty Dumpty

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

The summer was bad for Humpty Dumpty. But he had a great Fall.

Website 4 the day:

Jobs that no longer exist:
https://www.popularmechanics.com/culture/g36177735/odd-obsolete-jobs/?slide=1

Eating elephants

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat.,
-- Todd Stocker

Website 4 the day:

News from all parts of the political spectrum:
https://ground.news/

Listen to me!

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

If everyone listened to me, the world would be a better place.
-- Aviva Moore

Website 4 the day:

Michelangelos' hidden drawings:
https://www.atlasobscura.com/places/michelangelos-hidden-drawings

The sport of laziness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

If being lazy was an Olympic sport, I would totally win the bronze.
-- Kevin Molesworth

Website 4 the day:

Ontological thoughts:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXW-QjBsruE

Looking better naked

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

Exercise makes you look better naked. So does Tequila. Your choice.
-- Charles Bukowski

Website 4 the day:

Housecat history:
https://getpocket.com/explore/item/a-brief-history-of-house-cats

The ship has sailed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

That ship has not only sailed but has been dry-docked and turned into a museum.
-- Bob Odenkirk

Website 4 the day:

HP calculator museum:
https://www.hpmuseum.org/

Good punch-lines

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 29, 2021, In : Humor

Every good punch-line comes from being punched.
-- Maureen Muldoon

Website 4 the day:

Free classic books:
https://www.planetebook.com/ebooks/

How kind you are

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 28, 2021, In : Humor

No matter how kind you are, German kids are kinder.

Website 4 the day:

Church of the Later Day Dude:
https://dudeism.com/

A neck brace

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 28, 2021, In : Humor

I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I’ve never looked back since.

Website 4 the day:

Understand math:
https://betterexplained.com/

Can't win

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 28, 2021, In : Humor

You can't win at everything, but you can laugh at everything.
-- Robert Killinger

Website 4 the day:

When 1 second stretched to an hour:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jh2cZKQZ1XA

Seven days

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 27, 2021, In : Humor

Seven days without laughter makes one weak.
-- Mort Walker

Website 4 the day:

OpenToonz animation software:
https://opentoonz.github.io/e/

Unmarried surgeon

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 27, 2021, In : Humor

An unmarried transplant surgeon avoided dating due to his fear of rejection.

Website 4 the day:

Free audiobook summaries:
https://www.quickread.com/

To err is human

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 27, 2021, In : Humor

To err is human; to refrain from laughing, humane.
-- Lane Olinghouse

Website 4 the day:

Identify seals:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUaNHA-WQWg

Laugh!

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 27, 2021, In : Humor

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and the world laughs at you.
-- J. M. Linsner

Website 4 the day:

How to learn electronics, programming, physics, and aeronautics:
https://github.com/joaocarvalhoopen/Guides_Linux-Programming-Electronics-Aeronautics

Girlfriend moved to Siberia

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 27, 2021, In : Humor

My girlfriend moved to Siberia. Now she seems cold and distant.

Website 4 the day:

Online Spirograph:
http://htmlspirograph.com/

Only as good

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 27, 2021, In : Humor

You’re only as good as your last haircut.
-- Fran Lebowitz

Website 4 the day:

Markdown editor:
https://dillinger.io/

Sins of deserts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

Eating too much cake is the sin of gluttony. However, eating too much pie is ok because the sin of pi is zero.

Website 4 the day:

Mac-and-cheese ice cream:
https://www.today.com/food/kraft-releases-mac-cheese-ice-cream-van-leeuwen-t225112

Housekeeping

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

Housekeeping is like being caught in a revolving door.
-- Marcelene Cox

Website 4 the day:

Worst pandemic roommate:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECxeA6OWpcA

Narrow-minded

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

He was so narrow-minded, he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.
Molly Ivins

Website 4 the day:

If educational videos were like music videos:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G025oxyWv0E

New firing range

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

I’m thinking of opening a firing range where all the targets are shaped like computers with screens full of pop-up ads.
-- Dan Burt

Website 4 the day:

What is your food name?
https://www.playbuzz.com/mailib10/whats-your-food-nickname

Very privileged

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

I never feel more privileged than when I get angry about website design.
-- Kelly Oxford

Website 4 the day:

Text web browser:
https://lynx.browser.org/

On the edge

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

Being on the edge isn’t as safe, but the view is better.
-- Ricky Gervais

Website 4 the day:

Repairing iPhone's cracked back glass:
https://digg.com/video/watching-how-a-cracked-iphone-screens-back-glass-gets-restored

Two-year old vs. blender

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

A two-year old is kind of like a blender, but you don’t have any top for it.
-- Jerry Seinfeld

Website 4 the day:

Does society collapse this century?
https://www.vice.com/en/article/z3xw3x/new-research-vindicates-1972-mit-prediction-that-society-will-collapse-soon

Cheap hair piece

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

I bought a hair piece at a yard sale for only $1. It was a small price toupee.

Website 4 the day:

Elephant translation:
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-first-google-translate-for-elephants-debuts/

Learning from mistakes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

I learn from the mistakes of people who took my advice.
-- Pakalu Papito

Website 4 the day:

Parametric 3D modeling:
https://openscad.org/

Daydreaming

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, September 3, 2021, In : Humor

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Chicken embryo developing in glass:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOLy6J1Sorg

I was shocked

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, September 1, 2021, In : Humor

I was shocked when I found out my toaster wasn’t waterproof

Website 4 the day:

Unusual products:
https://www.theimpulsivebuy.com/wordpress/

It's hard doing nothing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, September 1, 2021, In : Humor

Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you’re finished.
-- Leslie Nielsen

Website 4 the day:

This night sky does not exist:
https://arthurfindelair.com/thisnightskydoesnotexist/

How many lemons?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, September 1, 2021, In : Humor

How many lemons grow on a tree? All of them.

Website 4 the day:

This horse does not exist:
https://thishorsedoesnotexist.com/

I wish

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, September 1, 2021, In : Humor

I wish we could become better strangers.
-- William Shakespeare

Website 4 the day:

These lyrics do not exist:
https://theselyricsdonotexist.com/

If you were the prize

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, September 1, 2021, In : Humor

If you were the prize at the end of my race, I would walk backwards.
-- Judge Judy

Website 4 the day:

This startup does not exist:
https://thisstartupdoesnotexist.com/

Resistance training

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

I am trying resistance training. I refuse to exercise.

Website 4 the day:

Comic artwork tool:
https://medibangpaint.com/en/pc/

What the world needs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility; there are so few of us left.
-- Oscar Levant

Website 4 the day:

Open source GUI prototyping tool:
https://pencil.evolus.vn/

Swiss army

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

I've always wanted to go to Switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives.
-- Billy Connolly

Website 4 the day:

3D models:
https://thangs.com/

Suck at the trumpet

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

If you suck at playing the trumpet, that is probably why.

Website 4 the day:

Ankle exoskeletons:
https://www.freethink.com/articles/ankle-exoskeleton

If you were an idiot

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

Suppose you were an idiot, and suppose you were a member of Congress; but I repeat myself.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

End of world countdown:
https://www.kamogo.com/21

Observing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

You can observe a lot by just watching.
-- Yogi Berra

Website 4 the day:

Application security - community edition:
https://portswigger.net/burp/releases/professional-community-2021-4-3?requestededition=community

So ugly

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Break glass:
https://www.breakstuffbayarea.com/

Defining middle age

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places.
-- E. Joseph Cossman

Website 4 the day:

Send some snow:
https://www.breakstuffbayarea.com/

Six out of seven

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

Six of seven dwarves aren't Happy.

Website 4 the day:

Capture MP3s from YouTube:
https://ytmp3.cc/youtube-to-mp3/

Lost in thought

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Electric planes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kj4PE9uATJA

Being wise

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.
-- Sam Levesnson

Website 4 the day:

No code web and mobile app development:
https://solutions.appsheet.com/

Horse money

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

Anybody who finds it easy to make money on the horses is probably in the dog food business.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

PDF Tools for Windows:
https://tools.pdf24.org/en/creator

Crying over an onion

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Python for low-cost microcontrollers:
https://circuitpython.org/

Forced to live

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.
-- W. C. Fields

Website 4 the day:

Balanced news:
https://www.allsides.com/

Autocorrect

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

Autocorrect is my own worst enema.

Website 4 the day:

Prisoners' inventions:
https://temporaryservices.org/served/projects-by-name/prisoners-inventions/

I wish I knew

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
-- Eubie Blake

Website 4 the day:

Library of mistakes:
https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/podcast-library-of-mistakes

The trouble with jogging

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

The trouble with jogging is that, by the time you realize you’re not in shape for it, it’s too far to walk back.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Classic movies:
https://www.classiccinemaonline.com/

When to start

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

The time to begin most things is ten years ago.
-- Mignon McLaughlin

Website 4 the day:

Follow a raindrop:
https://river-runner.samlearner.com/

It takes 20 years

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

It takes one woman twenty years to make a man of her son – and another woman twenty minutes to make a fool of him.
-- Helen Rowland

Website 4 the day:

Drama of metal forming:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEatTMQsGtg

When I was kidnapped

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Intuitive vector graphics editor:
https://boxy-svg.com/

The internet is great

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, August 2, 2021, In : Humor

The greatest thing about the internet is that you can quote something and just totally make up the source.
-- Benjamin Franklin

Website 4 the day:

Visualize mathematics:
https://www.imaginary.org/program/surfer

Three unwritten rules

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 28, 2021, In : Humor

The three unwritten rules of business:

Website 4 the day:

Tattoo ideas:
https://tattoo-ideas.com/

Stirred but not shaken

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 28, 2021, In : Humor

I’m not confused, I’m just well mixed.
-- Robert Frost

Website 4 the day:

Artificial inflation of climate news:
https://syntheticmessenger.labr.io/

Pie slicing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 28, 2021, In : Humor

Cut my pie into four pieces, I don’t think I could eat eight.
-- Yogi Berra

Website 4 the day:

Documentaries:
https://www.documentarystorm.com/

Something for nothing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 28, 2021, In : Humor

When you get something for nothing, you just haven’t been billed for it yet.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Planning D Day:
https://www.popularmechanics.com/military/a15909/how-d-day-was-planned-1944

Single because ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 28, 2021, In : Humor

I’m single because I was born that way.
-- Mae West

Website 4 the day:

70+ Python projects:
https://www.theinsaneapp.com/2021/06/list-of-python-projects-with-source-code-and-tutorials.html

Tree identification

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, July 16, 2021, In : Humor

You can tell a tree is a dogwood tree by its bark.

Website 4 the day:

Slide rule simulators:
https://www.sliderules.org/

Support bacteria

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, July 16, 2021, In : Humor

Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Spoof calls:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBsh9cC3FH4

Why shoes?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, July 16, 2021, In : Humor

We only need to wear shoes because the British built roads which hurt our feet.
-- Anthony Burgess

Website 4 the day:

Weirdness of computers:
https://suricrasia.online/iceberg/

Keeping calm

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, July 16, 2021, In : Humor

The British have a remarkable talent for keeping calm, even when there is no crisis.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Scanner art:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p2yTNVebKR4

Do you mind?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, July 16, 2021, In : Humor

Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

First person look at the Capitol Riot:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hszd21sQa0s

Something to do

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, July 16, 2021, In : Humor

Just go up to somebody on the street and say, “You’re it!” and just run away.
-- Ellen Degeneres

Website 4 the day:

Google Docs templates:
https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/24-google-docs-templates-will-make-life-easier

ID theft

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 15, 2021, In : Humor

My friend David had his ID stolen. He is now just Dav.

Website 4 the day:

Internet radio station list:
https://www.internet-radio.com/

Working in a pet store

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 15, 2021, In : Humor

I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Lost English letters:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJxKyh9e5_A

You're old

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 15, 2021, In : Humor

You know you’re old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you’re barefoot.
-- Phyllis Diller

Website 4 the day:

Have you been in a data breach?
https://monitor.firefox.com/

Behind every great man...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 15, 2021, In : Humor

Behind every great man there is a woman rolling her eyes.
-- Jim Carrey

Website 4 the day:

Create Windows shortcuts that don't ask UAC permissions:
https://www.tenforums.com/tutorials/57690-create-elevated-shortcut-without-uac-prompt-windows-10-a.html

Follow the masses

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 15, 2021, In : Humor

Be careful when you blindly follow the Masses… Sometimes the ‘M’ is silent.
-- Leonardo DiCaprio

Website 4 the day:

Windows Image Viewer:
https://www.faststone.org/FSViewerDetail.htm

Talk is cheap?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 15, 2021, In : Humor

Anybody who thinks talk is cheap should get some legal advice.
Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Selenium automated browser:
https://www.selenium.dev/

Dividing the Red Sea

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 8, 2021, In : Humor

Did Moses divide the Red Sea by using a sea-saw?

Website 4 the day:

Three famous burgers recreated:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sBEmFxdpQGI

Constantly smiling

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 8, 2021, In : Humor

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.
-- Laurell K. Hamilton

Website 4 the day:

Painting a "transparent" wall:
https://digg.com/video/graffiti-artist-shows-how-he-pulls-off-painting-a-transparent-wall

Grooming

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 8, 2021, In : Humor

If I were to start taking care of my grooming, I would no longer be my own self; so, the hell with it.
-- Albert Einstein

Website 4 the day:

Free open-source password manager:
https://www.passbolt.com/

Education

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 8, 2021, In : Humor

Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Rocking a stuck roller coaster:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9qAnG-7OzU

Make an editor happy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 8, 2021, In : Humor

Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very;’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Glass breaking at 800,000 frames per second:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EE7ug2okU-E

Be there or be square

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 29, 2021, In : Humor

"Be there or be square" means that you are not a-round.

Website 4 the day:

Inflate and animate a drawing:
https://monstermash.zone/

Waking women in love

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 29, 2021, In : Humor

Don’t wake up a woman in love. Let her dream, so that she does not weep when she returns to her bitter reality.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Screen capture and video editing:
https://www.movavi.com/

Adjective forms

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

Since the adjective of "metal" is "metallic" shouldn't the adjective of "iron" be "ironic"?

Website 4 the day:

Ash Kyd's website:
https://ash.ms/vlog/

Wife's mood ring

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

I got my wife a mood ring. It works real good! When she's in a good mood it turns blue, but when she's in a bad mood there's a red mark across my forehead.
-- Jeff Foxworthy

Website 4 the day:

SQL injection penetration testing tool:
https://sqlmap.org/

Valuable truth

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession and therefore are economical in its use.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Live captioning on desktop Google Chrome:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/enable-live-captions-in-chrome-desktop

Down to earth

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

I’m very much down to earth, just not this earth.
-- Karl Lagerfeld

Website 4 the day:

Where to watch ducks:
https://sickofthis.xyz/

Wetness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

How very wet this water is.
-- L. Frank Baum

Website 4 the day:

How long have you traveled:
https://www.kamogo.com/14

Foolish money

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

A fool and his money are soon partying.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Remove malware from Windows:
https://www.windowscentral.com/how-remove-malware-using-microsoft-safety-scanner-windows-10

Pub walking

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 22, 2021, In : Humor

It only takes me minutes to walk to the pub and over a half-hour to go home. The difference is staggering.

Website 4 the day:

Free, secure email:
https://www.mailpile.is/

The Interstate Highway System

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 21, 2021, In : Humor

Thanks to the Interstate Highway System, it is now possible to travel across the country from coast to coast without seeing anything.
-- Charles Kuralt

Website 4 the day:

Koko's final message:
https://www.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/lpypdt/kokos_final_message_to_humanity/

Worse than raining cats and dogs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 8, 2021, In : Humor

I thought it was bad raining cats and dogs, but it got worse when hailing taxis.

Website 4 the day:

Intelligent flash cards:
https://apps.ankiweb.net/

Bumping plates

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, June 2, 2021, In : Humor

When one tectonic plate bumped into another it said "Sorry! My fault."

Website 4 the day:

DIY Big Mac:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgIfypeptJw

A good memory

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, June 2, 2021, In : Humor

I distinctly remember forgetting that.
-- Clara Barton

Website 4 the day:

AI or not AI?
https://tidiosurveys.typeform.com/to/Qhh2ILd0

Surprising cost

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, June 2, 2021, In : Humor

You’d be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap.
-- Dolly Parton

Website 4 the day:

Odd programming languages:
https://catseye.tc/article/Languages.md

A fitting title

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 28, 2021, In : Humor

The purchasing manager for a medical department was given the title "buy-ologist."

Website 4 the day:

Read and write image metadata:
https://exiftool.org/

It takes so long

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 28, 2021, In : Humor

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

The recumbent bike:
https://thereader.mitpress.mit.edu/a-complete-illustrated-history-of-the-recumbent-bicycle

Didn't go to college

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 28, 2021, In : Humor

I didn't go to college, but if I did, I would have taken all my tests at a restaurant, because the customer is always right.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Cartoon skeletons:
https://www.boredpanda.com/digital-art-photoshop-famous-cartoon-characters-anatomical-skeletons-luisrogeriop

Factory work

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 28, 2021, In : Humor

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Omega Mart commercials:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGHxXw7Qcs8

Man of my word

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 28, 2021, In : Humor

I am a man of my word, and that word is "unreliable."
-- Demitri Martin

Website 4 the day:

What does Google know about you?
https://www.usatoday.com/story/tech/columnist/komando/2021/04/01/google-tracks-lot-data-you-heres-how-erase-it/4811047001/

Furniture calls

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 14, 2021, In : Humor

The furniture store keeps calling me to come back. But all I wanted was one night stand

Website 4 the day:

$1700 electric jeep:
https://electrek.co/2021/01/30/awesomely-weird-alibaba-electric-vehicle-1500-electric-jeep/

Broken grammar

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 14, 2021, In : Humor

The semicolon broke grammar laws and was given two consecutive sentences.

Website 4 the day:

Pass the salt:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nORRgU8sGdE

Napoleon's coat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, April 28, 2021, In : Humor

Napoleon may not have designed the coat he wore, but he did have a hand in it.

Website 4 the day:

1891 American slang dictionary:
https://archive.org/details/americanslangdic00maitiala/page/n5/mode/2up

Not all have brains

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, April 28, 2021, In : Humor

The problem with the world is that everyone does not have a brain, but everyone does have a tongue.
― Raheel Farooq

Website 4 the day:

Virtual lava lamp:
http://www.slightlyinteresting.com/lavalamp/lava.asp

Beethoven would never succeed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 27, 2021, In : Humor

Everyone told Beethoven that he would never succeed in music, just because he was deaf. But did he listen?

Website 4 the day:

Online spirograph:
https://nathanfriend.io/inspirograph/

Life and love

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 27, 2021, In : Humor

Life is one fool thing after another, whereas love is two fool things after each other.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Worm composting:
https://digg.com/video/time-lapse-of-worms-composting-leaves-cardboard-and-paper-over-100-days

Become a trash collector

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

To become a trash collector you don't need much training. You just pick it up as you go along.

Website 4 the day:

Prank glitter bomb:
https://pranksanonymous.com/product/glitter-bomb/

Someday

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Someday is not a day of the week.
-- Denise Brennan-Nelson

Website 4 the day:

Email aliases:
https://polycred.com/

Luggage theft

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

I went on trial for stealing some luggage. It was a brief case.

Website 4 the day:

O RLY book cover generator:
https://dev.to/rly

Like a sewer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Life is like a sewer… what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
-- Tom Lehrer

Website 4 the day:

Golf-Tip:
https://1800golftip.com/

Short weekends

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

The weekends are too short for sleep!
-- Bryant A. Loney

Website 4 the day:

13 psychology tricks:
https://thelifehacker.org/2020/06/22/13-psychology-tricks-that-will-work-on-anybody/

Wherever Dad is

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

I’m sure wherever my Dad is, he’s looking down on us. He’s not dead, just very condescending.
-- Jack Whitehall

Website 4 the day:

The Greek Antikythera Mechanism:
https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-021-84310-w.pdf

Afraid of success

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

My therapist says I’m afraid of success. I guess I could understand that, because after all, fulfilling my potential would really cut into my sitting-around time.
-- Maria Bamford

Website 4 the day:

Who hates who?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWX0bbGAd0k

Living within your means

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Nano vs. Bitcoin:
https://medium.com/nanocurrency/nano-is-what-bitcoin-hoped-to-be-a84aecf46b74

The Los Angeles Angels

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Does it disturb anyone else that ‘The Los Angeles Angels’ baseball team translates directly to ‘The The Angels Angels’?
-- Neil DeGrasse Tyson

Website 4 the day:

C extensions for Python:
https://cython.org/

Winter fat gone

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Finally, my winter fat is done. Now I have spring rolls.

Website 4 the day:

Official US Government website:
https://www.usa.gov/

Sushi and plastic surgery

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.
-- Graham Norton

Website 4 the day:

Open access journals and articles:
https://doaj.org/

Beautiful sunrises

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.
-- Mindy Kaling

Website 4 the day:

Search the Dark Web:
https://ahmia.fi/

Lack of communcation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Escape Zoom meetings:
https://zoomescaper.com/

Other's paths

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. Then by all means follow that path.
-- Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

Slap-cooking a chicken:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHFhnnTWMgI

Start of shopping season

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, April 6, 2021, In : Humor

Halloween is the beginning of the holiday shopping season. That’s for women. The beginning of the holiday shopping season for men is Christmas Eve.
-- David Letterman

Website 4 the day:

Construct3 game maker:
https://www.construct.net/en

Moses

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

Moses was a basket case.

Website 4 the day:

Create flowcharts:
https://flowchart.fun/

Almost everything

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

90 percent of everything is crap.
-- Theodore Sturgeon

Website 4 the day:

Interesting Engineering:
https://interestingengineering.com/

Washington DC

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.
-- John. F. Kennedy

Website 4 the day:

The Milky Way:
https://astroanarchy.blogspot.com/2021/03/gigapixel-mosaic-of-milky-way-1250.html

Nice being a pessimist

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised.
-- George Will

Website 4 the day:

Pick-up lines used by women:
https://www.researchgate.net/profile/T-Joel-Wade/publication/337990989_Can_I_have_your_number_Men's_perceived_effectiveness_of_pick-up_lines_used_by_women/links/5df912ba299bf10bc3634656/Can-I-have-your-number-Mens-perceived-effectiveness-of-pick-up-lines-used-by-women.pdf

Defamation of character

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

I was going to sue for defamation of character, but then I realized I have no character.
-- Charles Brakley

Website 4 the day:

Turbo encabulator:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fjcJp_Nwvk

Marriage alternative

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and just give her a house.
-- Rod Stewart

Website 4 the day:

Retroencabulator:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aW2LvQUcwqc

Don’t want a whole dessert

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

'I don’t want a whole dessert; let’s just get two spoons.' - Former friends of mine
-- Anna Kendrick

Website 4 the day:

Lego Oreo cheesecake:
https://digg.com/video/this-stop-motion-oreo-cheesecake-made-out-of-legos-looks-mouthwateringly-delicious

Dwarves and midgets

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

Dwarves and midgets have little in common.

Website 4 the day:

Hamster obstacle course:
https://digg.com/video/hamster-obstacle-course-video

Created 2 humans

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

Sometimes I am amazed that my wife and I created two human beings from scratch yet struggle to assemble the most basic of IKEA cabinets.
-- John Kinnear

Website 4 the day:

Welcome to the River Styx:
https://riverstyx.com/

Yell at your kids

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

If you are not yelling at your kids, you are not spending enough time with them.
-- Reese Witherspoon

Website 4 the day:

Time tracking:
https://toggl.com/track/signup/

The younger generation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, March 26, 2021, In : Humor

Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn't have anything to do with it.
-- Haim Ginott

Website 4 the day:

Screw types:
https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/604025/86582542.jpg

Middle age fright

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you'll grow out of it.
-- Doris Day

Website 4 the day:

Face recognition in Python:
https://pypi.org/project/deepface/

Not old enough

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

No man is ever old enough to know better.
-- Holbrook Jackson

Website 4 the day:

Map of the universe:
https://share.smartnews.com/scPY

Magazine collector

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

I told my therapist about my obsession with collecting magazines. He said that I have a lot of issues.

Website 4 the day:

Find faces like yours on the internet:
https://pimeyes.com/en

Learned from children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Laundry symbols:
https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/604025/86582534.jpg

Nothing to do

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

Teenagers complain there's nothing to do, then stay out all night doing it.
-- Bob Phillips

Website 4 the day:

Privacy-centric browser:
https://librewolf.readthedocs.io/en/latest/

The high road

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

Whoever established the high road and how high it should be should be fired.
-- Sandra Bullock

Website 4 the day:

Bicyling science:
https://direct.mit.edu/books/book/3998/Bicycling-Science

Let me check my calendar

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

I just realized that ‘Let me check my calendar’ is the adult version of ‘Let me ask my mom.
-- Noelle Chatham

Website 4 the day:

Virtual Reality meetings:
https://spatial.io/ ?yola-link-is-coming=true

Wrote children's books

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

I wrote a few children’s books… not on purpose.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Check for email/password breaches:
https://www.confidently.com/databreach.html

Worn out fast

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents.
-- John J. Plomp

Website 4 the day:

Test Linux versions in a browser:
https://distrotest.net/

Persistent debt

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

Your debt will stay with you if you can't budge it.

Website 4 the day:

Pun-ish company names:
https://cheezburger.com/13424645/pun-business-names-that-really-went-for-it

Why babies?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

Make no mistake about why these babies are here—they are here to replace us.
-- Jerry Seinfield

Website 4 the day:

Run classic operating systems in a browser:
https://youtu.be/2XYTARp4TNg

X-rayed my head

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

The doctors x-rayed my head and found nothing.
-- Dizzy Dean

Website 4 the day:

Pick a color:
http://www.romeolight.com/products/cp1/

How grateful

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

I cannot tell you how grateful I am - I am filled with humidity.
-- Gib Lewis

Website 4 the day:

Swiss Army Knife blades:
https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/604025/86582538.jpg

If we don't succeed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.
-- Dan Quayle

Website 4 the day:

Cloak your photos:
https://sandlab.cs.uchicago.edu/fawkes/

Give a man a fish

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Making the Slice of Life film:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjVowm9Sy9M

Barbie popular?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 10, 2021, In : Humor

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Amateur Blade Runner fan film:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyn0cLCMKsM

Named after Einstein

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 4, 2021, In : Humor

I was named after Einstein. Yeah, he was named in 1879.

Website 4 the day:

Sell your startup:
https://microacquire.com/

Simply wise

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 4, 2021, In : Humor

It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and say the opposite.
-- Sam Levenson

Website 4 the day:

Amazon product price history:
https://keepa.com/

Slow children playing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 4, 2021, In : Humor

I think those neighborhood signs that say ‘slow children playing’ are so very mean.
-- Zack Galifianakis

Website 4 the day:

15 facts:
https://15facts.com/

Went to a meeting

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 4, 2021, In : Humor

I went to a meeting for premature ejaculators. I left early
-- Jack Benny

Website 4 the day:

Anti-social media:
http://www.noiys.com/

Afraid of heights

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, March 4, 2021, In : Humor

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

The deadliest pandemics:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2020/local/retropolis/coronavirus-deadliest-pandemics/

My drug test

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 25, 2021, In : Humor

I scored high on my drug test.

Website 4 the day:

If you dug a hole straight through the earth:
https://www.antipodesmap.com/

Small swimming pool donation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 12, 2021, In : Humor

A man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation for a local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water.

Website 4 the day:

Ames window illusion:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBap_Lp-0oc

Popular labor-saving device

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 12, 2021, In : Humor

The most popular labor-saving device is still money.
-- Phyllis George

Website 4 the day:

Convert Audible files to MP3:
https://openaudible.org/

Stop imitating a flamingo

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 12, 2021, In : Humor

When my wife insisted that I stop imitating a flamingo, I had to put my foot down.

Website 4 the day:

Popsicle piano:
https://digg.com/video/someone-made-a-miniature-piano

Joking gods

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 12, 2021, In : Humor

The gods too are fond of a joke.
-- Aristotle

Website 4 the day:

The UFO collection:
https://www.theblackvault.com/documentarchive/ufos-the-central-intelligence-agency-cia-collection/

How to be happy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 12, 2021, In : Humor

It isn't necessary to be rich and famous to be happy. It's only necessary to be rich.
-- Alan Alda

Website 4 the day:

Trump Twitter archive:
https://www.thetrumparchive.com/

Someone stole my antidepressants

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

Someone stole my antidepressants. I hope he's happy!

Website 4 the day:

Beginner's guide to GIT:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/beginners-guide-to-git

Critics are like eunuchs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
-- Brendan Behan

Website 4 the day:

Global sleep durations:
https://i.redd.it/etrutievbq661.png

Save the earth

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

Everybody wants to save the earth; no one wants to help mom do the dishes.
-- P. J. O'Rourke

Website 4 the day:

Growing red pepper:
https://digg.com/video/red-bell-pepper-grow-time-lapse

The road to hell

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

The road to hell is paved with adverbs.
-- Stephen King

Website 4 the day:

Toxicological analysis of George’s marvellous medicine:
https://www.bmj.com/content/371/bmj.m4467

The trouble with this country

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

The trouble with this country is that there are too many people going about saying, ‘The trouble with this country is ….
-- Sinclair Lewis

Website 4 the day:

Darth by Darthwest:
https://digg.com/video/someone-inserted-cary-grant-into-star-wars

No enemies

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Machine learning in Python, Pytorch:
https://pytorch.org/

Stupidity got us into this mess

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 2, 2021, In : Humor

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Forest xylophone:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_CDLBTJD4M

What to call a used car salesman

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

A used auto salesman can also be called a car-deal-ologist.

Website 4 the day:

Become a cartoon:
https://www.linuxjournal.com/article/8093

The trouble with some women

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing, and then they marry him.
-- Cher

Website 4 the day:

$1.50 logic analyzer:
http://www.ganssle.com/tem/tem411.html#article2

Marxist and Fascist similarity

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

I’ve been married to one Marxist and one Fascist, and neither one would take the garbage out.
-- Lee Grant

Website 4 the day:

Quantum mechanics, explained:
https://www.sciencealert.com/17-year-old-wins-global-science-prize-for-brilliant-explainer-on-quantum-mechanics

A self-made man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

He is a self-made man and worships his creator.
-- Henry Clapp

Website 4 the day:

Internet link problem reports:
https://downdetector.com/

Compressing words

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
-- Abraham Lincoln

Website 4 the day:

Link and information manager for Chrome browser:
https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/braintool/fialfmcgpibjgdoeodaondepigiiddio

I know a man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.
-- Johnny Carson

Website 4 the day:

Very short movie summaries: Log file explorer: http://glogg.bonnefon.org/
http://www.rinkworks.com/movieaminute/

The road to success

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 29, 2021, In : Humor

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Mars Perseverance rover landing trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JpISn-B6VA0

Adam and Eve were first

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Adam and Eve were the first to ignore apple's terms and conditions.

Website 4 the day:

The science of funny:
https://digg.com/video/heres-the-funniest-joke-in-the-world-according-to-science

Successful women

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.
-- Stephanie Piro

Website 4 the day:

Create Venn diagrams:
https://www.visme.co/venn-diagram-maker/

Life in Lubbock

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Life in Lubbock, Texas, taught me that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth, and you should save it for someone you love.
-- Butch Hancock

Website 4 the day:

Personality quiz:
https://www.16personalities.com/

Acts of God

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

The only people who still call hurricanes acts of God are the people who write insurance forms.
-- Neil deGrasse Tyson

Website 4 the day:

Haiku generator:
https://www.nsahaiku.net/

Reincarnation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I don’t believe in reincarnation, and I didn’t believe in it when I was a hamster.
-- Shane Richie

Website 4 the day:

The Oregon Trail:
https://archive.org/details/msdos_Oregon_Trail_The_1990

Instant gratification

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Instant gratification takes too long.
-- Carrie Fisher

Website 4 the day:

Kitten cam:
https://explore.org/livecams/cats/kitten-rescue-cam

Living in the past

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I admit that I live in the past, but only because housing is so much cheaper.
-- Matt Wohlfarth

Website 4 the day:

Miniature animal sculptures:
https://www.thisiscolossal.com/2020/07/fanni-sandor-miniature-animals/

One flower to another

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

One flower's stamen said to another's pistil "I like your style!".

Website 4 the day:

Penny helicopter:
https://www.airplanesandrockets.com/helicopters/penni-helicopter-jan-1970-aam.htm

Best with coffee

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

What goes best with a cup of coffee? Another cup.
-- Henry Rollins

Website 4 the day:

Third generation glitter bomb:
https://digg.com/video/glitter-bomb-porch-pirate

Income source

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Filling out a credit card application, my friend came upon this question: ‘What is your source of income?’ She wrote: ‘ATM.
-- Michael Mcrae

Website 4 the day:

Will robots take your job?
https://willrobotstakemyjob.com/

Where's the homework?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I recently asked a student where his homework was. He replied, ‘It’s still in my pencil.
-- Larry Timmons

Website 4 the day:

Open source programming IDE:
https://codelite.org/

Do it all over again

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I asked my brother-in-law, the father of four boys, ‘If you had it to do all over again, would you still have kids?’ ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘Just not these four.
-- Sheila Lee

Website 4 the day:

Windows console emulator:
https://cmder.net/

Harder on a relationship

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Not sure which is harder on a relationship: sharing a dresser for three years or sharing an iPhone charger for one day.
-- Rhea Butcher

Website 4 the day:

Set up Windows Subsystem for Linux 2 (WSL2) after WSL is installed:
https://www.windowscentral.com/how-install-wsl2-windows-10

Never at lunch

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.
-- Ronald Reagan

Website 4 the day:

Set up Windows Subsystem for Linux (WSL):
https://www.windowscentral.com/install-windows-subsystem-linux-windows-10

Formula for ice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

If the chemical formula for water is H₂O, is the formula for ice (H₂O)^{3?

Website 4 the day:The world's first math mistake:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZVs6wF7nC4}
Continue reading ...

Coffiee

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.
-- Alphonse Allais

Website 4 the day:

Interactive cybersecurity platform:
https://defendtheweb.net/

Furniture salesman

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.
-- Les Dawson

Website 4 the day:

Learn hacking from Google:
https://google-gruyere.appspot.com/

Not superstitious

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 9, 2021, In : Humor

I'm not superstitious but I am a little stitious.
-- Steve Carrell

Website 4 the day:

Windows 10 Powertoys:
https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/windows-10-powertoys/

Chicken crosses the playground

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

Website 4 the day:

Adventure:
https://emojiadventure.blogspot.com/p/chicken.html

Program solving made easy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

The easiest way to solve a problem is to pick an easy one.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Dating site for the dead:
http://www.ghostsingles.com/

The wisdom of age

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

With age comes wisdom, but sometimes age comes alone.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Elastic man:
https://www.adultswim.com/etcetera/elastic-man/app.html

Get with the program

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

Every time I “get with the program”… somebody changes the channel.
-- Lynn Johnston

Website 4 the day:

Spacebar counter:
https://www.eggradients.com/tool/spacebar-counter

Boy swallowed some coins

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, the nurse replied “No change yet.”

Website 4 the day:

Things organized neatly:
https://thingsorganizedneatly.tumblr.com/

At the fork in the road

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
-- Yogi Berra

Website 4 the day:

Shared piano:
https://musiclab.chromeexperiments.com/Shared-Piano

My own rules

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife).. but still my own.
-- Si Robertson

Website 4 the day:

Guides on writing simple English:
http://www.plainenglish.co.uk/free-guides.html

Learning from mistakes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly.
-- Peter Cook

Website 4 the day:

Windows keyboard shortcuts:
https://www.softwareok.com/?seite=Microsoft/QuickTextPaste

Treat your wife

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

I read that you should treat your wife like you did on your first date. So, after dinner tonight I'm dropping her off at her parent's house.

Website 4 the day:

SpaceVIM:
https://spacevim.org/

Don't know

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

A man doesn’t know what he knows until he knows what he doesn’t know.
-- Laurence J. Peter

Website 4 the day:

Find people's details based on their phone number:
https://medium.com/@santhosh23mj/gather-information-from-phonenumbers-using-phoneinfoga-7f4daa6bcea3

True terror

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.
-- Kurt Vonnegut

Website 4 the day:

Find people:
https://thatsthem.com/people-search

So drunk

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

I got so drunk that I passed out in my fireplace. I slept like a log.

Website 4 the day:

Check a username across social media platforms:
https://github.com/sherlock-project/sherlock

Talking to God

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

When we talk to God, we’re praying. When God talks to us, we’re schizophrenic.
-- Jane Wagner

Website 4 the day:

System simulation in Python:
https://m-labs.hk/gateware/nmigen/

Ant activity

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

It’s only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny day that you realize how often they burst into flames.
-- Harry Hill

Website 4 the day:

Component search engine:
https://componentsearchengine.com/

Black cat crossing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
-- Groucho Markx

Website 4 the day:

Classic cartoons:
https://www.youtube.com/user/8thManDVDcom

Buying happiness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 9, 2020, In : Humor

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop.
Gertrude Stein

Website 4 the day:

De-Googled Android OS:
https://e.foundation/

Candy cane collection

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 7, 2020, In : Humor

I have a candy cane collection. They are all in mint condition.

Website 4 the day:

All 403 Bob Ross episodes:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxcnsr1R5Ge_fbTu5ajt8DQ

Laughing at mistakes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 7, 2020, In : Humor

Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can shorten it.
-- Cullen Hightower

Website 4 the day:

The oldest song:
https://faroutmagazine.co.uk/the-oldest-song-in-the-world-written-3400-years-ago/

Crying strawberry

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

The baby strawberry was crying because his parents were in a jam.

Website 4 the day:

Try to make 2048:
https://play2048.co/

He is insane

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Ordinarily he is insane. But he has lucid moments when he is only stupid.
-- Heinrich Heine

Website 4 the day:

Find recipes for what you have:
https://www.supercook.com/

Changing a man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.
-- Natalie Wood

Website 4 the day:

Astronomy picture of the day:
https://apod.nasa.gov/apod/astropix.html

Dangerous weapons

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.
-- Frank Lloyd Wright

Website 4 the day:

Lame Facebook posts:
http://www.lamebook.com/

Secret of success

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

The secret of success is to offend the greatest number of people.
-- George Bernard Shaw

Website 4 the day:

Crossfade from the web:
https://crossfade.io/

Raising children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.
-- P. J. O'Rourke

Website 4 the day:

Making a PB&J:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mm1NfUUCJgc

Don't know where you are going

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.
-- Yogi Berra

Website 4 the day:

Scream into the void:
https://screamintothevoid.com/

Waking up grumpy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Some mornings I wake up grumpy. And some mornings I just let him sleep.

Website 4 the day:

Six degrees of Wikipedia:
https://www.sixdegreesofwikipedia.com/

The value of loss

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.
-- Mignon McLaughlin

Website 4 the day:

Spreadsheet database:
https://airtable.com/

The taste of soap

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like, never washed a dog.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Create mobile apps from Google spreadsheets:
https://www.glideapps.com/

Love is the answer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question.
-- Lily Tomlin

Website 4 the day:

Improve Windows security:
https://www.makeuseof.com/easy-ways-boost-security-microsoft-defender-and-windows-10/

Acupuncture

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Acupuncture is a jab well done.

Website 4 the day:

Free video conferencing:
https://meet.jit.si/

Homework skills

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

I’m learning skills I will use for the rest of my life by doing homework…procrastinating and negotiation.
-- Bill Waterson

Website 4 the day:

Three free collaboration boards:
https://lucidspark.com/

One thing against Moses

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Let me tell you the one thing I have against Moses. He took us forty years into the desert in order to bring us to the one place in the Middle East that has no oil!
-- Golda Meir

Website 4 the day:

Free task planner:
https://pdapps.org/kanbani/

Procrastinate

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Procrastinate now, don’t put it off.
-- Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

An hour of active satellites:
https://streamable.com/u3v8ew

Horse's hay

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

After the horse ate all of his hay, he had a baleful look about him.

Website 4 the day:

Space images converted into sound:
https://www.system-sounds.com/

More confidence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Name logos:
https://www.textgiraffe.com/

Doctor's good news

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
-- Steve Martin

Website 4 the day:

Talent sourcing:
https://usebraintrust.com

Newborn looks

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like! It was born 15 minutes ago it looks like a potato.
-- Kevin Hart

Website 4 the day:

Face mask for Amazon employees:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_AXx2XSI4Kw

Why hummingbirds hum

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

The reason that hummingbirds hum is that they don't know the words.

Website 4 the day:

Ordering a pizza can be hard:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dtVKaGpn8Gg

A terrible childhood

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Sometimes I wish I had a terrible childhood, so that at least I’d have an excuse.
-- Jimmy Fallon

Website 4 the day:

Collatz calculator:
https://www.dcode.fr/collatz-conjecture

You’re getting old

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

You know you’re getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It’s like, ‘See if you can blow this out’.
-- Jerry Seinfeld

Website 4 the day:

WIndows-like Linux distro:
https://www.linuxfx.org/

Feminine intuition

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 30, 2020, In : Humor

Feminine intuition is a fiction and a fraud. It is nonsensical, illogical, emotional, ridiculous, and practically foolproof.
-- Harry Haenigsen

Website 4 the day:

Military brownies:
https://digg.com/video/us-military-brownie-recipe

Alternative titles

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 14, 2020, In : Humor

librarian -> bookkeeper
referee -> game warden
dairyman -> cowboy.

Website 4 the day:

Stellar origin periodic table:
https://www.eurekalert.org/multimedia/pub/242813.php

What is a neighborhood?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 14, 2020, In : Humor

A neighborhood is a residential area that is changing for the worse.
-- John Ciardi

Website 4 the day:

Code search:
https://searchcode.com/

Women and children first

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 14, 2020, In : Humor

The only reason they say, "Women and children first," is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
-- Judy Allen

Website 4 the day:

3D search:
https://thangs.com/

Traveling companions

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 14, 2020, In : Humor

It's easier to find a traveling companion than to get rid of one.
-- Art Buchwald

Website 4 the day:

Decluttered search:
https://www.yippy.com/

Grass without rain

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 14, 2020, In : Humor

Two blades of grass were discussing the lack of rain, when one finally said "Guess, we'll have to make dew."

Website 4 the day:

NASA's images:
https://images.nasa.gov/

Practical religion

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 7, 2020, In : Humor

I recently became a Christian Scientist. It was the only health plan I could afford.
-- Betsy Salkind

Website 4 the day:

Search with images of found sites:
https://peekier.com/

Worst asthma

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 7, 2020, In : Humor

Asthma bothers me if I'm around dogs or cigars. The worst are dogs smoking cigars.
-- Steve Allen

Website 4 the day:

Free WordPress hosting for a year (cheap after that):
https://youtu.be/cG9kv5-5bPI

Just sugar

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 7, 2020, In : Humor

Cotton candy is just sugar made to look like insulation.
-- Mike Birbiglia

Website 4 the day:

Fast Python:
https://doc.pypy.org/en/latest/index.html

Really bad cooking

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 7, 2020, In : Humor

My cooking is so bad I have an oven that flushes.
-- Phyllis Diller

Website 4 the day:

Free VPN for a year:
https://youtu.be/m-i2JBtG4FE

Adopted?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 7, 2020, In : Humor

I asked my mother if I was adopted and she said, "Not yet, but we've placed an ad."
-- Dana Snow

Website 4 the day:

Flood a scammer:
https://scammerblaster.com/

A blind date

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 7, 2020, In : Humor

I had a blind date with a woman who carried a taser in her purse. She was stunning.

Website 4 the day:

Robots come in peace, written by AI:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/sep/08/robot-wrote-this-article-gpt-3

Sundials and stopped clocks

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, October 6, 2020, In : Humor

A stopped clock is right twice a day, but a sundial can be used to stab someone, even at night.
-- John Hodgman

Website 4 the day:

Mirror screens wirelessly:
https://letsview.com/

Humans can't do this

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, October 6, 2020, In : Humor

One thing computers can do that humans can't is sit in a sealed box for months.
-- Jack Handey

Website 4 the day:

Tight squeezes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qdwOsSPvq9g

Boring

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, October 6, 2020, In : Humor

A bore is a person who talks when you want him to listen.

-- Ambrose Bierce

Website 4 the day:

AI boosts frames per second:
https://sites.google.com/view/wenbobao/dain

Your first child

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, October 6, 2020, In : Humor

After your first child, your role in life will be apparent.

Website 4 the day:

Battery race:
https://youtu.be/7jqImhd8Ggc

My worst job

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 29, 2020, In : Humor

My worst job was selling phones over the phone. I'd call people, and if they answered, I'd hang up because they already had one.
-- Remo Goodale

Website 4 the day:

Centennial lightbulb:
https://www.centennialbulb.org/photos.htm

A dog or a child?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 29, 2020, In : Humor

I can't decide between a dog and a child. Should I ruin my rug or my life?
-- Rita Rudner

Website 4 the day:

Android minus Google:
https://e.foundation/

Money v. happiness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 29, 2020, In : Humor

Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.
-- Bill Vaughan

Website 4 the day:

US air quality map:
https://gispub.epa.gov/airnow/

Garden soil

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 29, 2020, In : Humor

As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.

Website 4 the day:

Useless machines:
https://www.youtube.com/c/JosephsMachines

Truth is beauty

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 29, 2020, In : Humor

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in a library?
-- Lily Tomlin

Website 4 the day:

Info on the past:
https://www.whizzpast.com/

Eating candy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 1, 2020, In : Humor

I can eat candy with either hand. I am ambidextrose.

Website 4 the day:

Find similar websites:
http://www.moreofit.com/

A calculated risk

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 1, 2020, In : Humor

I took a calculated risk. Unfortunately, I am bad at math.

Website 4 the day:

The worst for sale:
http://theworstthingsforsale.com/

Not fat from beer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 1, 2020, In : Humor

Beer doesn’t make you fat. It makes you lean….against bars, tables, chairs, and walls.

Website 4 the day:

Circular seal:
https://digg.com/video/circular-swimming-fixture-for-a-seal

Dogs chasing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

A cop just knocked on my door and told me that my dogs were chasing people on bikes. That's absurd, my dogs don't even own bikes.

Website 4 the day:

The secret door:
http://ww3.safestyle-windows.co.uk/the-secret-door/

Safe with me

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

Your secrets are safe with me because, chances are, I wasn’t even listening.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Chewing gum prank:
https://www.stick-of-gum.com/

Replaced our bed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline; she hit the roof.

Website 4 the day:

Wasting time:
https://iwastesomuchtime.com/

Wine, beer, and water

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.
-- Benjamin Franklin

Website 4 the day:

Stories by the National Geographic photographers:
http://thephotosociety.org/

Ineffectively small

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.
-- Dalai Lama

Website 4 the day:

Making Hostess snack cakes:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=VC601rjqdjY

Saturn's rings

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.
-- Mark Russell

Website 4 the day:

Are you rich?
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2019/08/01/upshot/are-you-rich.html

Calf crossing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

Why did the calf cross the road? To get to the udder side.

Website 4 the day:

Facebook ad library:
https://www.facebook.com/ads/library/

Door holding

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

I like holding the door for people who are far away, you know so they have to run a little.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Lego prosthetic arm:
https://www.cnn.com/videos/style/2020/07/17/great-big-story-lego-prosthetic-arm-gbs.great-big-story

Eating a horse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

Do you ever get halfway through eating a horse and go ‘you know, I’m not as hungry as thought I was’?
-- Tim Vinel

Website 4 the day:

Jigsaw from your photo:
http://www.jigzone.com/

The backache of love

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 30, 2020, In : Humor

Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.
-- George Burns

Website 4 the day:

Hidden smartphone codes:
https://www.rd.com/list/hidden-smartphone-codes-you-should-start-using/

Not a harp

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

I went to a costume party and the host asked what I came as. I told him that I was a harp and he said that I was too small to be a harp. He called me a lyre!

Website 4 the day:

Amazing cakes:
https://time.com/5865483/croc-cake/

Refuse to answer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don’t know the answer.
-- Douglas Adams

Website 4 the day:

F22 flight controls:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Evhrk5tY-Yo#

Not crazy about reality

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Text-based window manager:
https://www.byobu.org/home

Slow guy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

I know a guy who is so slow, it takes him a half-hour to eat a three-minute egg.

Website 4 the day:

Walking car:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=6PpuNENmmBU

2 common elements

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
-- Harlan Ellison

Website 4 the day:

Bad day fails:
https://www.boredpanda.com/bad-day-fails/

Following my dreams

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with 'em later.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Scalable recipes:
https://theskullery.net/

Don’t gobblefunk

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

Don’t gobblefunk around with words.
-- Roald Dahl

Website 4 the day:

Jewelry that reminds you to not touch your face:
https://www.engadget.com/nasa-coronavirus-covid-19-necklace-jpl-stop-touching-your-face-194312229.htm

Who laughs last

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.
-- Charles de Gaulle

Website 4 the day:

Riding on the moon:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTQ-SmeLTl8

Being in shape

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

I’m in shape. Round is a shape.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

American healthcare failure:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=al8OrbSAO0s

The chief cause

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Making paper cups:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=3vboPdSjjAo

Amish vehicles

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 29, 2020, In : Humor

Amish vehicles are real grass-guzzlers.

Website 4 the day:

Medieval cat paintings explained:
https://www.youtube.com/watch&v=1HzpBaIiVsw

Odorless perfume

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Odorless perfume is non-scents.

Website 4 the day:

Fakje vintage ads:
https://cheezburger.com/11786757/fake-vintage-ads-that-bring-the-absurdity

Party with my characters

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

If I were invited to a dinner party with my characters, I wouldn’t show up.
-- Dr Seuss

Website 4 the day:

Cubified animals:
https://cheezburger.com/11758341/digital-artist-transforms-animal-photos-into-cubes

Nature's way

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Camping is nature’s way of promoting the motel business.
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Photorealistic images with transparent backgrounds:
http://www.pngplay.com/

The Dead Sea of my boyhood

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

When I was a boy, the Dead Sea was only sick.
-- George Burns

Website 4 the day:

Explore the Last Supper:
https://artsandculture.google.com/story/explore-the-last-supper/sAKCB2AzvHUmKQ

Fond of children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

I am fond of children - except boys.
-- Lewis Carroll

Website 4 the day:

Game to help depression:
https://www.media.mit.edu/projects/guardians/overview/

Call me ugly

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Whenever someone calls me ugly I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.
-- Will Ferrell

Website 4 the day:

Build your own historic tale:
https://htck.github.io/bayeux/#!/

Aggressive toilets

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Airplane toilets are aggressive. It wasn’t until I got back to my seat that I noticed my pants and testicles were missing.
-- Ryan Reynolds

Website 4 the day:

Anti-pest plants for your yard:
https://www.familyhandyman.com/list/11-pest-control-plants-you-need-in-your-yard/

Alcohol and literature

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature? Tequila mockingbird.

Website 4 the day:

Overflowin' Catbox Blues:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xO3d1_ECZ2o

Mondays are fine

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Mondays are fine. It’s your life that sucks.
-- Ricky Gervais

Website 4 the day:

Identify birds by their song:
https://birdnet.cornell.edu/

TV and weather

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Television is very much like the weather: Much can be said of it, but very damn little can be done about it.
-- Rod Serling

Website 4 the day:

Epub to Mobi converter:
https://www.epubconverter.com/epub-to-mobi-converter/

Behind every great man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
Jim Carrey

Website 4 the day:

Neil Young juke box:
https://neilyoungarchives.com/drawer?position=74.77704862863874

Breakfast at any time

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Python library to build data apps:
https://www.streamlit.io/

Geology rocks

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Geology rocks but Geography is where it’s at!

Website 4 the day:

Lego French toast:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=BJkkIoni8_I

Facts first

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, July 7, 2020, In : Humor

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Sheep-herding raccoon:
https://digg.com/2020/baby-raccoon-herds-sheep

I was fired

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 1, 2020, In : Humor

I was fired from the cardboard container company because I kept thinking outside the box.

Website 4 the day:

Cat songs:
https://youtu.be/xO3d1_ECZ2o

Ingesting horses

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, May 28, 2020, In : Humor

A guy was admitted to the hospital with eight plastic horses in his stomach. His condition is stable.

Website 4 the day:

Transfer up to 5GB for free:
https://www.plustransfer.com/#

Butcher bet

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, May 28, 2020, In : Humor

I bet the butcher the other day that he couldn't reach the meat that was on the top shelf. He refused to take the bet, saying that the steaks were too high.

Website 4 the day:

Convert online audios or videos to common format:
https://www.clipconverter.cc/

Opportunity

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, May 28, 2020, In : Humor

If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.
-- Milton Berle

Website 4 the day:

Wispy art:
https://29a.ch/sandbox/2011/neonflames/

Time flies

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, May 28, 2020, In : Humor

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

Website 4 the day:

Famous movie lines:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vxxm1ygUCsM&t=9s

High school math

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, May 28, 2020, In : Humor

While sitting in high school math class, I had to wonder if it wasn't coincidence that the word "number" starts with "numb."

Website 4 the day:

Checking for bed bugs in hotels:
https://www.consumerreports.org/video/view/home-garden/safety/5334685154001/how-to-check-for-bed-bugs-in-a-hotel-room/

Exploding cheese factory

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France? There was nothing left but de Brie!

Website 4 the day:

Free streaming music:
https://www.jango.com/

In favor of birth control

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?
-- Benny Hill

Website 4 the day:

Virtual tours:
https://www.airpano.com/

Abbreviation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.
-- Zach Galifianakis

Website 4 the day:

Microsoft Office tips, etc.:
https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/microsoft-office-mastery/

Mañana

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

Tomorrow is the busiest day of the week.

Website 4 the day:

Cat sleeping positions:
https://medium.com/tenderlymag/the-delicate-and-complex-art-of-cat-sleeping-positions-515e89872d67

Bath toys

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Printable 3D models:
https://www.yeggi.com/

Confidence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Crashes with one car removed:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDZ0pLQTMKQ

Dangerous bagel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

People in LA are deathly afraid of gluten. I swear to god, you could rob a liquor store in this city with a bagel.
-- Ryan Reynolds

Website 4 the day:

360-degree views of Russian train stations:
http://metro360.ru/#

Fight to the Finish

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

I saw a boxing match that was advertised as a "Fight to the Finish." That is a good place to end.

Website 4 the day:

Why do cats like sleeping with us?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLgsieZVFaY

Don’t sweat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Download an entire website from the Wayback Machine:
https://github.com/hartator/wayback-machine-downloader

Unlimited

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

You never run out of things that can go wrong
-- Edward A. Murphy

Website 4 the day:

Unlock PDFs:
https://www.sodapdf.com/unlock-pdf/

Toaster settings

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 9, 2020, In : Humor

Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.
-- Sam Levenson

Website 4 the day:

Text difference checker:
https://www.diffchecker.com/

Sumo championship

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 1, 2020, In : Humor

The weigh-in at the Sumo wrestling championship was a large scale effort.

Website 4 the day:

Transparent artwork:
https://www.cleanpng.com/

The earth's surface

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 1, 2020, In : Humor

If 70 percent of the earth's surface is covered by water, how come it's so hard to get to the beach?
-- Teressa Skelton

Website 4 the day:

Every timezone:
https://everytimezone.com/

A nervous breakdown

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, May 1, 2020, In : Humor

A nervous breakdown shows you care.
-- Robert Orben

Website 4 the day:

Simple explanation of machine learning:
https://thenextweb.com/neural/2020/04/25/machine-learning-models-explained-to-a-five-year-old-syndication/

Girlfriend at the zoo

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

My new girlfriend works at the Zoo. I think she is a keeper.

Website 4 the day:

Free licensed software:
https://www.giveawayoftheday.com/

Dry-clean only

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

This shirt is dry-clean only, which means it’s dirty.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

World stats:
https://www.worldometers.info/

Past relationships

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

I made a graph of my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

Website 4 the day:

1.8 billion pixel image of Mars:
https://www.jpl.nasa.gov/news/news.php?feature=7610

Most beautiful words

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

The most beautiful words in the English language aren't "I love you" but "it's benign.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

HTML/CSS crash course:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLblA84xge2_y8F1K0wzPia9V_ULVcfg4k

In debt

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

I remember being in so much debt that I couldn't afford my electricity bills, it was a dark time.

Website 4 the day:

Smithsonian Institute photos:
https://www.si.edu/openaccess

Long time writing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

I've been writing for a long time. I sat down to write my first novel in the middle of March of 1982.
-- J. A. Jance

Website 4 the day:

The science of well being:
https://www.coursera.org/learn/the-science-of-well-being

Hanging a map

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

I want to hang a map of the world in my house. Then I’m gonna put pins into all the locations I’ve traveled to, but first I’m gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won’t fall down.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Learn psychology:
https://nobaproject.com/

Dating a philosophy professor

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

I'm trying to date a philosophy professor, but she doesn't even know if I exist or not.

Website 4 the day:

Keeping $50 million in counterfeit 20's:
https://www.gq.com/story/the-great-paper-caper

Something to not do

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

Do not on any account attempt to write on both sides of the paper at once.
-- W. C. Sellar

Website 4 the day:

Blockchain video streams:
https://lbry.tv/

Late-night TV commercial

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

I saw a commercial on late-night TV that said ‘Forget everything you know about slipcovers.’ So I did. It was a load off my mind. Then the commercial tried to sell slipcovers and I didn’t know what the hell they were.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Free uninstaller:
https://www.nirsoft.net/utils/uninstall_view.html

The universal aptitude

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, March 31, 2020, In : Humor

The universal aptitude for ineptitude makes any human accomplishment an incredible miracle.
-- John Stapp

Website 4 the day:

Jules Verne's illustrations:
http://jv.gilead.org.il/rpaul/

Banks and secrets

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

Why can't a bank keep a secret? They have too many tellers!

Website 4 the day:

View and edit photos:
https://www.xnview.com/en/xnviewmp/

Housework

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
-- Erma Bombeck

Website 4 the day:

Create music in Excel:
https://www.theverge.com/2020/2/6/21126465/xl-studio-music-making-drum-microsoft-excel-daw-dylan-tallchief

Shocking mistake

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I was shocked to find out it was a mistake to hire a cut-rate electrician.

Website 4 the day:

Grocery coupons:
https://lozo.com/

Anybody

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. I’m beginning to believe it.
-- Clarence Darrow

Website 4 the day:

Short DIY videos:
https://tangi.co/

Failure like fertilizer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.
-- Denis Waitley

Website 4 the day:

3D CAD software:
https://www.openscad.org/

Don't marry until

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.
-- Will Ferrell

Website 4 the day:

Flashpoint webgame preservation project:
http://bluemaxima.org/flashpoint/

Finishing last

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.
-- Abe Lemons

Website 4 the day:

Past versus present:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VU0mpPm9U-4&feature=youtu.be

High eyebrows

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.

Website 4 the day:

Check to see if your car has recalls:
https://www.nhtsa.gov/recalls

Where I am

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I live on a one-way street that’s also a dead end. I’m not sure how I got there.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Typewriter art:
https://digg.com/video/watch-this-artist-use-a-typewriter-to-beautifully-illustrate-an-english-countryside

Don't weigh myself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I'm holding onto are.
-- Matt Bellassai

Website 4 the day:

Writing tool:
https://www.thesaurus.com/writingtool

Failed kindergarten

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I failed kindergarten because I couldn’t spell my last name.
-- Zach Galifianakis

Website 4 the day:

City roads:
https://anvaka.github.io/city-roads/

Priest and attorney

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

My priest just passed the bar exam. He is now my father-in-law.

Website 4 the day:

Sue anyone:
https://www.theverge.com/2018/10/10/17959874/donotpay-do-not-pay-robot-lawyer-ios-app-joshua-browder

Love and money

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

They say love is more important than money…Have you tried paying your bills with a hug?
-- Dave Chappelle

Website 4 the day:

Public debates:
https://www.kialo.com/

Intelligent women

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract.
-- Kathy Lette

Website 4 the day:

The sky:
https://www.google.com/sky/

Blank dictionary

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I bought a dictionary and when I got home I realized all the pages were blank; I have no words for how angry I am.

Website 4 the day:

International Space Station tour:
https://youtu.be/Snn1k_qEx20

Driving fast

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Unbiased fact check site #5:
https://www.truthorfiction.com/

Going to church

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.
-- Billy Sunday

Website 4 the day:

Unbiased fact check site #4:
https://www.factcheck.org/

All you need is love

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.
-- Charles M. Schulz

Website 4 the day:

Unbiased fact check site #2:
https://www.snopes.com/

Facebook is like jail

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, February 15, 2020, In : Humor

Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, you write on walls and you get poked by people you don’t know.
-- Will Ferrell

Website 4 the day:

Unbiased fact check site #1:
https://mediabiasfactcheck.com/

Why aliens don't visit

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 17, 2020, In : Humor

Aliens don't visit earth because of our rating: we only have one star.

Website 4 the day:

Search the Dark Web (be careful!):
https://ahmia.fi/

Iron Maiden tape loop

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 17, 2020, In : Humor

I have an Iron Maiden tape loop playing by my windmill because it is a big metal fan.

Website 4 the day:

Windows paint program:
https://www.microsoft.com/en-us/p/fresh-paint/9wzdncrfjb13

Put me to sleep

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, January 17, 2020, In : Humor

The wild pig put me to sleep. He was a boar.

Website 4 the day:

Internet hoax slayer:
https://www.hoax-slayer.net/

Always straightening

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

If you are always straightening things, you have OCD. If you are always eating things, you have OBCD.

Website 4 the day:

Fake e-mail addresses:
http://www.fakemailgenerator.com

Population of Ireland's capital

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

Ireland's capital must be overpopulated by now because every day it's Dublin.

Website 4 the day:

Create a broken file:
http://www.xnet.se/fd/

A big family

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married.
-- Lewis Grizzard

Website 4 the day:

Fake credit card numbers:
https://www.darkcoding.net/credit-card-numbers/

Military justice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Create a font:
https://fontforge.org/en-US/

Hollywood people

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

Half the people in Hollywood are dying to be discovered and the other half are afraid they will be.
-- Lionel Barrymore

Website 4 the day:

PowerPoint templates:
https://www.free-powerpoint-templates-design.com/

People who drink

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

I envy people who drink - at least they know what to blame everything on.
-- Oscar Levant

Website 4 the day:

Heavenly answers:
http://www.askmoses.com/

Avoid the argument

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 16, 2020, In : Humor

Never get into an argument with a schizophrenic person and say, "Who do you think you are?"
-- Ray Combs

Website 4 the day:

Private search:
https://www.searchencrypt.com/

Happy spots

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

The ink spots were jubilant because they just came out of the pen.

Website 4 the day:

Observe the weather:
https://www.weather.gov/coop/BecomeAnObserver

Love my cell phone

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

We love our own cell phones but hate everyone else's.
-- Joe Bob Briggs

Website 4 the day:

Ship your enemies glitter:
http://www.shipyourenemiesglitter.com/

Learning to fly

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
-- Douglas Adams

Website 4 the day:

Free printable habit tracker:
https://tealnotes.com/free-printable-bullet-journal-habit-tracker-template/

Without statistics

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

In ancient times they had no statistics, so they had to fall back on lies.
-- Stephen Leacock

Website 4 the day:

Nooooooooooooooo:
http://nooooooooooooooo.com/

Composition of the universe

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

The universe is made up of electrons, protons, neutrons, and morons.
-- Andy Dappen

Website 4 the day:

Drop trash into the can:
http://www.trashloop.com/

Cleaning my spice rack

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

While cleaning my spice rack, I saw that everything was old and had to be thrown out. – What a waste of thyme.

Website 4 the day:

Live satellite images of the earth:
https://zoom.earth/

Dogsled riding

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

Dogsled riding is both relaxing and fragrant
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Psychoactive drugs:
https://www.erowid.org/

Walk with the Lord

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

A man once told me to walk with the Lord. I'd rather walk with the bases loaded.
-- Ken Singleton

Website 4 the day:

Blockchain symphony:
https://symphony.iohk.io/en/

If you are not the windshield

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

Some days you're a windshield, some days you're a bug.
-- Price Cobb

Website 4 the day:

Gross science:
https://www.youtube.com/user/grossscienceshow

Lizard with a stroller

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

A lizard walks into a bar pushing a baby in a stroller. “What’s your kid’s name?” asks the bartender. “Tiny,” says the lizard. “Because he’s my newt.”

Website 4 the day:

Sexual health chatbot:
https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/roo-sexual-health-chatbot

What is a decision

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

A decision is what a man makes when he can't find anybody to serve on a committee.
-- Fletcher Knebel

Website 4 the day:

Learn digital painting:
https://www.ctrlpaint.com/

Scrabble with children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

Children are the best opponents in Scrabble because they are easy to beat the fun to cheat.
-- Fran Lebowitz

Website 4 the day:

Drawing lessons:
http://www.drawingcoach.com/

Age of proof

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

I'm now at an age where I have to prove that I'm as good as I never was.
-- Rex Harrison

Website 4 the day:

VBA in Excel:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/writing-vba-macro-microsoft-excel/

Inheriting the earth

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 25, 2019, In : Humor

Jesus said that the meek would inherit the earth. So far, all we've got is Minnesota and North Dakota.
-- Garrison Keillor

Website 4 the day:

Quadratic equations made easy:
https://www.technologyreview.com/s/614775/a-new-way-to-make-quadratic-equations-easy/

Through a campground

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 16, 2019, In : Humor

Yesterday I ran through a campground, but that was past tents.

Website 4 the day:

How to crack a safe:
https://www.sparrowslockpicks.com/v/vspfiles/files/SPARROWSVaultInstructions2019104.pdf

All wrapped up in yourself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 16, 2019, In : Humor

If you are all wrapped up in yourself, you are overdressed.
-- Kate Halvorson

Website 4 the day:

A compiler for carpentry:
https://grail.cs.washington.edu/projects/carpentrycompiler/

Health food

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 16, 2019, In : Humor

My husband thinks that health food is anything he eats before the expiration date.
-- Rita Rudner

Website 4 the day:

How to take notes:
https://pdf.wondershare.com/mobile-app/cornell-note-taking-system.html

Comparative weights

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 16, 2019, In : Humor

Comparing the weight of water and butane, I found water to be heavier because butane is a lighter fluid.

Website 4 the day:

Second Cousin Once Removed:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBt5V7kO3j4

Bagpipe tunes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 16, 2019, In : Humor

If you've heard one bagpipe tune, you've heard them both.
-- Jack Finney

Website 4 the day:

Earth satellite images:
http://rammb.cira.colostate.edu/ramsdis/online/

Dancing till the cows come home

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, December 16, 2019, In : Humor

I could dance with you till the cows come home, but I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Everyone can draw:
https://www.drawspace.com/

Police cars without wheels

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

A thief stole all the wheels off of the police cars. The cops are working on the case tirelessly.

Website 4 the day:

Puppies:
https://openpuppies.com/

Gave birth to twins

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

After a long delivery and giving birth to twins - a boy and a girl - the exhausted new mom fell soundly asleep. With the husband out of town, the woman's brother named the tots. He named the girl Denise and the boy Denephew.

Website 4 the day:

Separate vocals and instruments:
https://deezer.io/releasing-spleeter-deezer-r-d-source-separation-engine-2b88985e797e

Bad chocolate mousse

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Make machine learning models:
https://teachablemachine.withgoogle.com/

Why Santa is jolly

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Industrial espionage:
https://www.crowdstrike.com/resources/wp-content/brochures/reports/huge-fan-of-your-work-intelligence-report.pdf

Bible's straight man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

Who was the straightest man in the bible? Joseph because the pharaoh made him a ruler.

Website 4 the day:

How funny are words?
https://link.springer.com/content/pdf/10.3758%2Fs13428-017-0930-6.pdf

Clones

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

Clones are people two.

Website 4 the day:

Fold and one cut font:
https://erikdemaine.org/fonts/simplefoldcut/

Sleep talking

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
-- Albert Camus

Website 4 the day:

Uncle Dave's survival manual:
https://www.pssurvival.com/PS/Disaster_Prep/Captain_Daves_Survival_Guide_2002.PDF

Bad estimate

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

They misunderestimated me.
Geroge W. Bush

Website 4 the day:

Run DOS programs on Windows 10:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/use-vdos-run-dos-programs-windows/

No banks

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

I don't believe in banks and store all my money in my mattress. Now I have a quite a lump sum.

Website 4 the day:

Realistic computer speech:
https://deepmind.com/blog/article/wavenet-generative-model-raw-audio

Borrowing from China

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

The trouble with borrowing money from China is that thirty minutes later you feel broke again.
-- Steve Bridges

Website 4 the day:

Guided meditations:
https://www.uclahealth.org/marc/mindful-meditations

Credible consultants

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at any company.
-- Scott Adams

Website 4 the day:

Virtual machine on Android:
https://www.vmos.com/

No lines

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, November 14, 2019, In : Humor

There are never any lines at the bathroom at a public swimming pool.
-- Dan Bradley

Website 4 the day:

Web-based music synthesizer:
https://z.musictools.live/

Sunken ship on the ocean floor

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

Divers found a sunken ship on the ocean floor that kept twitching. It was a nervous wreck.

Website 4 the day:

Copy/paste emojis, characters, etc.:
https://copychar.cc

Men and women

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

Here’s all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Make an infographic map in seconds:
http://mapinseconds.com/

A politician's career

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

The politician had a very promising career.

Website 4 the day:

Learn a language:
https://lingvist.com/

Elaborate chess

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

Chess is as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you can find outside an advertising agency.
-- Raymond Chandler

Website 4 the day:

Where to watch online movies:
https://www.chilimovie.com

Go to high school

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

You shouldn't have to go to high school until you are at least forty, you've had a lot of therapy, and you're ready for it.

-- Marilyn Kentz

Website 4 the day:

How compilers see your code:
https://godbolt.org/

What I need

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

Why don’t they give us things we can actually use? I don’t need a thinner phone. You know what I need? I need to tortilla chip that can support the weight of guacamole.
-- Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

Retaliation at Google:
https://www.documentcloud.org/documents/6427199-Examples-Retaliation-at-Google.html

Deep topic

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

I fell into the deep hole from which I fetch water and was stuck there all day. My time was well spent.

Website 4 the day:

Metropolis in color:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=t75YCtJJFX0&feature=youtu.be

Straight in the eye

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.
-- Garrison Keillor

Website 4 the day:

Stitch images into a composite:
https://www.microsoft.com/en-us/research/product/computational-photography-applications/image-composite-editor/

Phones

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, opulence is when you have three – and paradise is when you have none.
-- Doug Larson

Website 4 the day:

Free fall icons and graphics:
https://www.shutterstock.com/blog/free-fall-icons-and-graphics

The only crime

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
-- Bob Hope

Website 4 the day:

Programming idioms:
https://www.programming-idioms.org/about#about-block-all-idioms

Coming in late

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

I asked my boss if I could sleep in tomorrow and come in late. He said "Dream on."

Website 4 the day:

Robot voice generator:
https://lingojam.com/RobotVoiceGenerator

A genuine medical need

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 12, 2019, In : Humor

It is inhumane in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity.
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Real-time internet stats:
https://www.webfx.com/internet-real-time/

Wooden dream

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 29, 2019, In : Humor

I dreamt that I was a piece of lumber. It wasn't interesting though, I was board.

Website 4 the day:

Celebrities record what you ask for money:
https://www.cameo.com/

A gentleman

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 29, 2019, In : Humor

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Who tweeted it first?
http://ctrlq.org/first/

Remember anything

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 29, 2019, In : Humor

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Free wallpaper:
https://interfacelift.com/wallpaper/downloads/date/any/

Birthday candles

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 29, 2019, In : Humor

When I blew out the candles on my birthday cake they were happy. In fact, they were delighted

Website 4 the day:

Guess your age:
https://www.how-old.net/

Don't succeed at first

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 29, 2019, In : Humor

If at first you don’t succeed you’re running about average.
-- M. H. Alderson

Website 4 the day:

Play musical scales:
https://femurdesign.com/omni/

Keep giving

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 29, 2019, In : Humor

Guilt the gift that keeps on giving.
-- Erma Bombeck

Website 4 the day:

Space news:
https://www.space.com

Toilet paper

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

Toilet paper plays an important roll in my life.

Website 4 the day:

How to spell a word:
http://tellspell.com/

Advice

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice.
-- Saul Bellow

Website 4 the day:

How to Create a Short Song in LMMS:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/create-short-song-in-lmms/

A bank job

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Website 4 the day:

What the earth looked like in the past:
http://dinosaurpictures.org/ancient-earth#0

Honest criticism

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.
-- Franklin P. Jones

Website 4 the day:

Terrifying declassified government documents:
https://www.buzzfeed.com/sydrobinson1/declassified-government-documents-terrifying ?yola-link-is-coming=true

Nature's way

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

The paper clip:
https://slate.com/human-interest/2012/05/the-history-of-the-paper-clip-it-was-invented-in-1899-it-hasnt-been-improved-upon-since.html

Patience admiration

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.
-- Bill McGlashen

Website 4 the day:

Slide rule scales:
https://www.sliderulemuseum.com/SR_Scales.htm ?yola-link-is-coming=true

Love your neighbors

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because generally they are the same people.
-- G. K. Chesterton

Website 4 the day:

Enable Windows ransomware protection:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/enable-ransomware-protection-windows-defender/

Hunting for food

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 14, 2019, In : Humor

I’m glad I don’t have to hunt for my food, I don’t even know where Sandwiches live.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Quote tracing:
https://quoteinvestigator.com

Half a bagel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, September 12, 2019, In : Humor

Half a bagel is better than nothing.
Nothing is better than heaven.
Therefore half a bagel is better than heaven.

Website 4 the day:

AI creativity:
https://arxiv.org/pdf/1803.03453.pdf

Blessed are the cracked

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, September 12, 2019, In : Humor

Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Hacker powered security:
https://www.hackerone.com/sites/default/files/2019-08/hacker-powered-security-report-2019.pdf

Life's trouble

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, September 12, 2019, In : Humor

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.
-- Jim Carrey

Website 4 the day:

Webpage load time:
https://tools.pingdom.com

Phobia literature

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 30, 2019, In : Humor

I was going to buy a book on phobias, but I was afraid it wouldn't help me.

Website 4 the day:

Print your own customized gift wrap:
https://wripwrapwrop.com/en/

Sleep like a baby

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 30, 2019, In : Humor

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.
-- Leo J. Burke

Website 4 the day:

What is a day?
https://labs.minutelabs.io/what-is-a-day/#/welcome

Doctor's joke

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 30, 2019, In : Humor

Recently, my doctor made a joke about my back. It was about a weak back.

Website 4 the day:

Endangered sounds:
http://savethesounds.info/

The only profession

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 30, 2019, In : Humor

Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money.
-- Jules Renard

Website 4 the day:

International gun laws:
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2018/03/02/world/international-gun-laws.html

Bringing up children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 30, 2019, In : Humor

Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children and no theories.
-- John Wilmot

Website 4 the day:

Free DNS servers:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/best-dynamic-dns-providers/

Best time to buy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 22, 2019, In : Humor

A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.
-- Marty Allen

Website 4 the day:

Under-ten-cent processors:
https://cpldcpu.wordpress.com/2019/08/12/the-terrible-3-cent-mcu/

A rainy day

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 22, 2019, In : Humor

The shortest recorded period of time lies between the minute you put some money away for a rainy day and the unexpected arrival of rain.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn

Website 4 the day:

Learn Java by doing:
https://codegym.cc/

Long-distance

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 22, 2019, In : Humor

I'm in a long-distance relationship. Darn restraining order!

Website 4 the day:

The oldest plant:
https://www.wellandgood.com/good-food/spirulina-sleep/

An hourglass figure

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? A waist of time.

Website 4 the day:

Animal/food mash-ups:
https://mymodernmet.com/photo-manipulation-animals-ronald-ong/

Win or lose

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

It does not matter whether you win or lose, what matters is whether I win or lose!
-- Steven Weinberg

Website 4 the day:

High voltage / high current art:
http://capturedlightning.com/

Verbal contracts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.
-- Samuel Goldwyn

Website 4 the day:

Read webpages out loud:
https://talkify.net/

Inflation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.
-- Sam Ewing

Website 4 the day:

What is new on Netflix?
https://usa.newonnetflix.info/

Marriage

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations – we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Turkey's underground city of 20,000:
https://www.historicmysteries.com/derinkuyu-underground-city-cappadocia/

Lost in thought

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it’s unfamiliar territory.
-- Paul Fix

Website 4 the day:

Free professionally edited books:
https://standardebooks.org/

Going bald

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 15, 2019, In : Humor

I knew I was going bald because it was taking longer and longer to wash my face.
-- Harry Hill

Website 4 the day:

Sleep deprivation across the US:
https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/data_statistics.html

Most likely ...

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 9, 2019, In : Humor

Robert E. Lee's high school yearbook lists him as "Most likely to secede."

Website 4 the day:

Gerrymandered font:
https://techcrunch.com/2019/08/01/this-free-ugly-font-is-made-from-hideously-gerrymandered-districts/

Jogging adds years

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 9, 2019, In : Humor

My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.
-- Milton Berle

Website 4 the day:

Random design challenges:
http://protobot.org/#en

Desire dumber

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 9, 2019, In : Humor

I wish I were dumber so I could be more certain about my opinions. It looks fun.
-- Scott Adams

Website 4 the day:

Vegan recipes:
https://www.thevegancaveman.com/

No yes-men

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 9, 2019, In : Humor

I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.
-- Samuel Goldwyn

Website 4 the day:

Practical lock picking:
http://rageuniversity.org/PRISONESCAPE/PRISON%20LOCKS%20AND%20KEYS/Practical.Lock.Picking.pdf

Sleep-smoking

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 2, 2019, In : Humor

I accidentally fell asleep smoking an e-cigarette and when I woke up my whole house was on the internet.

Website 4 the day:

Cats are liquid:
https://www.boredpanda.com/cats-are-liquids/

Money vs. happiness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 2, 2019, In : Humor

Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.
-- Bill Vaughan

Website 4 the day:

Solving a humongous Rubik's cube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOJtLb_rPVg

French food

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 2, 2019, In : Humor

Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible.
-- Doug Larson

Website 4 the day:

3D printed lock pick gun:
https://hackaday.com/2019/07/17/3d-printed-snap-gun-for-automatic-lock-picking/

Money's worth

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 2, 2019, In : Humor

Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
-- Jackie Mason

Website 4 the day:

Free JavaScript books:
https://www.reddit.com/r/learnprogramming/comments/cf50qu/you_dont_know_javascript_but_you_could_for_free/

Volume of news

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 2, 2019, In : Humor

It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.
-- Jerry Seinfield

Website 4 the day:

Dress for space:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/2019/business/immersive-space-suits-history-fashion-and-function/?utm_term=.cbade8bdb56c

Work out almost daily

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 25, 2019, In : Humor

I work out almost every day. Friday I almost worked out, Saturday I almost worked out, Sunday I almost worked out...

Website 4 the day:

Apollo 11 in real time:
https://apolloinrealtime.org/11/

Family debates

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 25, 2019, In : Humor

I’ve come to learn that the best time to debate family members is when they have food in their mouths.
-- Kenneth Cole

Website 4 the day:

Python machine learning:
https://www.reddit.com/r/learnprogramming/comments/cfxxcd/machine_learning_get_started_with_python

Everything predetermined

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 25, 2019, In : Humor

I have noticed that even people who claim everything is predetermined and that we can do nothing to change it look before they cross the road.
-- Stephen Hawking

Website 4 the day:

Lightworks video editor:
https://www.lwks.com/

The 3 R's

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 25, 2019, In : Humor

You know there’s a problem when you realize that out of the three Rs, only one begins with an R.
-- Dennis Miller

Website 4 the day:

CD/DVD burner:
http://infrarecorder.org/

An intellectual

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 25, 2019, In : Humor

My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger.
-- Billy Connolly

Website 4 the day:

Algorithm tutorial:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLn2ipk-jqgZiAHiA70hOxAj8RMUeqYNK

Lion vs. calf

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 25, 2019, In : Humor

The lion shall lie down with the calf, but the calf won’t get much sleep
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Buy electronics from makers:
https://www.tindie.com/

Get better soon

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, July 22, 2019, In : Humor

Got my boss a "get better soon" card. She's not sick, I just think she could get better.

Website 4 the day:

Free movies on YouTube:
http://zerodollarmovies.com/catalog/english

Why no visitors?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 10, 2019, In : Humor

Why don't aliens visit our planet? Terrible ratings. One star.

Website 4 the day:

Give homeless money by phone:
https://news.vice.com/en_us/article/wjvavy/this-app-lets-you-give-money-to-homeless-people-from-your-phone

Diet's 2nd day

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 10, 2019, In : Humor

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day, you’re off it.
-- Jackie Gleason

Website 4 the day:

Send 5 GBytes for free:
https://transfer.pcloud.com/

Who are the users?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 10, 2019, In : Humor

User: the word computer professionals use when they mean “idiot.”
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Live filesharing and chat:
https://volafile.org/

What holds ships together

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 10, 2019, In : Humor

I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together; It was riveting.
-- Stewart Francis

Website 4 the day:

Free images for transfer:
https://thegraphicsfairy.com/

When I was younger

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 10, 2019, In : Humor

One time, a guy handed me a picture and said, “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture of you is when you were younger.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Draw a stickman:
http://www.drawastickman.com/

Never boils

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 10, 2019, In : Humor

A watched pot never boils, but it does get paranoid.
-- Lesley Wake

Website 4 the day:

Track when an image is seen:
https://grabify.link/

An origami store

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, July 7, 2019, In : Humor

I had a business plan for an origami store, but It folded.

Website 4 the day:

Compare airfares:
https://www.airfarewatchdog.com/

Confidence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, July 7, 2019, In : Humor

Confidence is 10% work and 90% delusion.
-- Tina Fey

Website 4 the day:

Free local TV:
https://www.locast.org/

Forgetting history

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, July 7, 2019, In : Humor

There’s an old saying about those who forget history. I don’t remember it, but it’s good.
-- Stephen Colbert

Website 4 the day:

Fool advertisers with Firefox:
https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/43j8qm/firefox-will-give-you-a-fake-browsing-history-to-fool-advertisers

Insomnia

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, July 7, 2019, In : Humor

Insomnia is my greatest inspiration.
-- Jon Stewart

Website 4 the day:

Picture yourself on Mt. Everest:
https://thetopofmounteverest.com/#home

Daydream

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, July 7, 2019, In : Humor

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Spell words with chemical symbols:
https://www.chemspeller.com/

Investment anxiety

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 25, 2019, In : Humor

I used to be mildly fearful of residential property investments. Now I have an apartment complex.

Website 4 the day:

Google slides to animated GIFs:
https://talltweets.com/

A fine place

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 25, 2019, In : Humor

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
-- Fred Allen

Website 4 the day:

Screenshot a web page:
https://screenshot.guru/

You might as well

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 25, 2019, In : Humor

The way taxes are, you might as well marry for love.
-- Joe E. Lewis

Website 4 the day:

View PCB layout:
https://openboardview.org/

40,000 piece puzzle

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, June 25, 2019, In : Humor

I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says "go outside."
-- Demetri Martin

Website 4 the day:

Signal waveform editor:
https://wavedrom.com/

Kangaroo high jumps

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 20, 2019, In : Humor

I saw a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State building, but was only because the building can't jump.

Website 4 the day:

Free 40 minute web/video conferencing:
https://zoom.us/

Bilingual hockey players

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 20, 2019, In : Humor

All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity.
-- Gordie Howe

Website 4 the day:

It's OK to ask for more time:
https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Publication%20Files/19-064_8312949a-87f4-493b-8362-d364382c3db4.pdf

Outdoor fun and more

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 20, 2019, In : Humor

Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Secure OS:
https://tails.boum.org/

Didn’t say it.

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 20, 2019, In : Humor

I don’t care what the tape says. I didn’t say it.
-- Ray Malavasi

Website 4 the day:

Anonymous OS:
https://www.whonix.org/

Just can't win

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 20, 2019, In : Humor

We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. I just can't figure out where else to play!
-- Pat Williams

Website 4 the day:

Bootable USB privacy:
https://tails.boum.org/

Cricket in heaven

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 20, 2019, In : Humor

Oh God, if there be cricket in heaven, let there also be rain.
-- Alec Douglas Home

Website 4 the day:

A person's looks from their speech:
https://arxiv.org/pdf/1905.09773.pdf

Hippo vs. Zippo

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, June 12, 2019, In : Humor

The difference Between a Hippo and a Zippo: one's really heavy, the others a little lighter.

Website 4 the day:

Find out about people:
https://thatsthem.com

Religious differences

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 6, 2019, In : Humor

My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God, and I didn't.

Website 4 the day:

Get stock by buying stuff:
https://bumped.com/

The inevitable

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, June 6, 2019, In : Humor

Change is inevitable – except from a vending machine.
-- Robert C. Gallagher

Website 4 the day:

Retargetable decompiler:
https://retdec.com/

A landscape gardener

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 1, 2019, In : Humor

I tried to hire a landscape gardener but he turned down the job because my yard was laid out as portrait.

Website 4 the day:

Vintage cat photos:
https://petapixel.com/2019/05/24/vintage-photos-of-cats-doing-human-things/

Middle age

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 1, 2019, In : Humor

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
-- Bob Hope

Website 4 the day:

Where is your birthday in Pi?
http://mypiday.com/

A bad memory

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 1, 2019, In : Humor

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.
-- Friedrich Nietzsche

Website 4 the day:

Free textbooks:
https://openstax.org/

Hard to put up with

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 1, 2019, In : Humor

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Create an avatar:
https://getavataaars.com/

Man's worst enemy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 1, 2019, In : Humor

Alcohol may be , but the bible says love your enemy.
-- Frank Sinatra

Website 4 the day:

Stay for free:
https://lifehacker.com/how-to-stay-for-free-anywhere-in-the-world-1832965711

Foolishly spent

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 1, 2019, In : Humor

Part of the $10 million I spent on gambling, part on booze and part on women. The rest I spent foolishly.
-- George Raft

Website 4 the day:

Virtualbox tutorial:
https://www.systemcodegeeks.com/virtualization/virtualbox/virtualbox-tutorial-virtualization-essentials/

Firing based on posture

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, May 23, 2019, In : Humor

My boss is going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I have a hunch, it might be me.

Website 4 the day:

How Bitcoin works:
https://www.bitcoinsimulator.tk/blockchain?chain=public

A neck brace

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 14, 2019, In : Humor

I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I've never looked back since.

Website 4 the day:

Zoidberg whoop:
http://www.instantwhoop.com/

Only one drink

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 14, 2019, In : Humor

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
-- George Burns

Website 4 the day:

Gruesome Body Bakery:
http://inventorspot.com/articles/body_bread_13546

The finger

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 14, 2019, In : Humor

I didn’t give you the finger…you earned it.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Eat and grow big:
http://slither.io/

Memory foam

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, May 14, 2019, In : Humor

I bought myself a memory foam mattress and now it’s trying to blackmail me.
-- Gary Delaney

Website 4 the day:

World Carrot Museum:
http://www.carrotmuseum.co.uk/

Being run down by a bike

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

Every day this same bike tries to run me down. This happens repeatedly. It is a vicious cycle.

Website 4 the day:

What to watch?
https://neverthink.tv

Like a nighttime phone call

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

Marriage is like a phone call in the night: first the ring, and then you wake up.
-- Evelyn Hendrickson

Website 4 the day:

Magnetic fluxlines:
https://www.hbs.edu/faculty/Publication%20Files/19-064_8312949a-87f4-493b-8362-d364382c3db4.pdf

So much left at the end

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?
-- John Barrymore

Website 4 the day:

The true size of countries:
https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2019-04/nifn-hbt042319.php

Free will

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

You must believe in free will; there is no choice.
-- Isaac Bashevis Singer

Website 4 the day:

Unlock Windows files:
https://www.iobit.com/en/iobit-unlocker.php#

Huge drink order

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

A man walks into a bar and orders 10 times the number of drinks as anyone else there.
The bartender responds "Now that is an order of magnitude."

Website 4 the day:

Cardboard bike:
https://vimeo.com/37584656

Feeling alone

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.
-- Jimmy Kimmel

Website 4 the day:

How long to binge watch ... ?
http://tiii.me/

Start with a smile

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, May 4, 2019, In : Humor

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
-- W. C. Fields

Website 4 the day:

YouTube's documentary channel:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_sXrcURB-Dh4az_FveeQ0Q

Walk the plank

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

My mother used to make me walk the plank when I was younger, we couldn't afford a dog.

Website 4 the day:

Wasting time:
https://iwastesomuchtime.com/

Billions for schools and roads

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads.
-- Andy Borowitz

Website 4 the day:

Find similar musicians:
https://www.music-map.com/

Why two senators?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

The reason that there are two senators from each state is so that one can be the designated driver.
-- Jay Leno

Website 4 the day:

Things organized neatly:
http://thingsorganizedneatly.tumblr.com/

The purpose of the brain

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

The human brain is a device to keep the ears from grating on one another.
-- Peter De Vries

Website 4 the day:

Museum of Flight:
http://www.museumofflight.org/Explore-The-Museum/

My old neighborhood

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

Where I grew up, you could walk ten blocks and never leave the scene of a crime.
-- Charlie Callas

Website 4 the day:

Audio-only films:
https://thenextweb.com/shareables/2019/04/03/listen-to-movie-at-work/

How to have a good day

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.

Website 4 the day:

Free Microsoft courses:
https://academy.microsoft.com/en-us/professional-program/tracks/

Only golf

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

Golf is the only sport where the object is to play as little as possible.
-- Charles G. McLoughlin

Website 4 the day:

Gardening tips:
http://freeplants.com/

A place for hotels

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

A hotel is a place that keeps the makers of twenty-five-watt lightbulbs in business.
-- Shelley Berman

Website 4 the day:

Ring of 48 high-speed cameras:
https://youtu.be/3fu3anMtDS8

Trouble with NYC

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

The trouble with New York is that it's so convenient to everything I can't afford.
-- Jack Barry

Website 4 the day:

Plant watercolors:
https://usdawatercolors.nal.usda.gov/pom/search.xhtml

Talking dogs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

If dogs could talk, they's say things like: "Hey! Hey! Hey!"
Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

Check USB manufacturer information:
https://www.softpedia.com/get/System/System-Info/ChipGenius.shtml

Things to never eat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, April 22, 2019, In : Humor

Never eat anything that has to be explained.
-- Charles Schulz

Website 4 the day:

Popular cars through the years:
https://www.popularmechanics.com/cars/g23320934/car-history/

Blank dictionary

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, April 14, 2019, In : Humor

I bought a dictionary and when I got home I realized all the pages were blank; I have no words for how angry I am.

Website 4 the day:

How to be a Wikipedia editor:
https://www.maketecheasier.com/howto-become-wikipedia-editor/

Food for travel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, April 14, 2019, In : Humor

Never travel without food in your pocket - if only to throw at attacking dogs.
-- E. S. Bates

Website 4 the day:

Are you owed a refund?
https://paribus.co/

The Flemish masters

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, April 14, 2019, In : Humor

We studied the Flemish masters using real phlegm.
-- Lew Cady

Website 4 the day:

Data breach support:
https://www.breachclarity.com/

Happily married

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, April 14, 2019, In : Humor

He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
-- Victor Borge

Website 4 the day:

7.5 billion people on one chart:
https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2019/04/the-world-s-7-5-billion-people-in-one-chart/

Politics

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, April 14, 2019, In : Humor

Politics: 'Poli' a Latin word meaning 'many'; and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures.'
-- Robin Williams

Website 4 the day:

The biggest theft:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnh0Z51H87s

Magic trapdoor

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 5, 2019, In : Humor

A magician added a trapdoor into his show. But I think it’s just a stage he’s going through.

Website 4 the day:

URL lengthener:
http://aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.com/

Money in golf

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 5, 2019, In : Humor

You can make a lot of money playing golf. Just ask my ex-wives.
-- Lee Trevino

Website 4 the day:

Unsearchable YouTube videos:
http://defaultfile.name/

As a porcupine

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, April 5, 2019, In : Humor

A friend said that in the next life she'd like to come back as a porcupine. She doesn't like crowds.
-- Brian Andreas

Website 4 the day:

Is it normal?
https://www.isitnormal.com/

Birthday present

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 27, 2019, In : Humor

I gave a bald friend a comb for his birthday. I think he liked the gift because he said he would never part with it.

Website 4 the day:

Three words can pinpoint your location:
https://what3words.com/

Canine IQ

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 27, 2019, In : Humor

A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
-- Jay Leno

Website 4 the day:

Python data analysis library:
https://pandas.pydata.org/

Climbing the ladder

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 27, 2019, In : Humor

She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
-- Mae West

Website 4 the day:

59 ways to cook eggs:
https://youtu.be/qWAagS_MANg

Excellent lawyer

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 27, 2019, In : Humor

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.
-- Fred Allen

Website 4 the day:

360-degree view of the Milky Way Galaxy:
https://futurism.com/the-byte/360-degree-video-milky-way-galaxy

Not even an inkling

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 27, 2019, In : Humor

There are truths of which I have an inkling, but of most I have only a penciling.
-- Robert Brault

Website 4 the day:

Genderless voice:
https://www.fastcompany.com/90321378/the-worlds-first-genderless-ai-voice-is-here-listen-now

May duct tape be with you

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 27, 2019, In : Humor

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
-- Carl Zwanzig

Website 4 the day:

Traffic simulation:
http://traffic-simulation.de/

Born again

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, March 18, 2019, In : Humor

I thought about being born again, but my mother refused.

Website 4 the day:

Hard pressure points:
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/324699.php

Answering an argument

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, March 18, 2019, In : Humor

If you cannot answer a man's argument, all it not lost; you can still call him vile names.
-- Elbert Hubbard

Website 4 the day:

YouTube mashups:
https://rave.dj/

Family fun

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, March 18, 2019, In : Humor

There's no such thing as fun for the whole family.
-- Jerry Seinfeld

Website 4 the day:

How random are you?
https://www.expunctis.com/2019/03/07/Not-so-random.html

Revealing signatures

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, March 18, 2019, In : Humor

A signature always reveals a man's character — and sometimes even his name.
-- Evan Esar

Website 4 the day:

Relative cost of living:
https://www.numbeo.com/cost-of-living/

My broken marionette

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 13, 2019, In : Humor

I am giving away my broken marionette. No strings attached.

Website 4 the day:

This startup does not exist
https://thisstartupdoesnotexist.com/

If at first you don't succeed

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, March 13, 2019, In : Humor

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

8 hours of Star Trek DS9 OPS sounds:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDEO07viY-g

Mexican magician

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

A Mexican magician was doing a magic trick. He said, Uno, Dose, and he disappeared without a trace

Website 4 the day:

Video editor:
https://shotcut.org/

Pessimism

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of other pessimists.
-- Jean Rostand

Website 4 the day:

Fold clothes like Marie Kondo:
https://www.familyhandyman.com/storage-organization/how-to-fold-clothes-like-marie-kondo/

Keeping a man guessing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

Don’t keep a man guessing too long – he’s sure to find the answer somewhere else.
-- Mae West

Website 4 the day:

Search public records:
http://brbpublications.com

Cleaning after children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard.
-- Margaret Culkin Banning

Website 4 the day:

Explore math:
https://www.desmos.com/

Double your money

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.
-- Kin Hubbard

Website 4 the day:

Salaries at Google, Facebook, and Microsoft:
https://www.levels.fyi/SE/Google/Facebook/Microsoft

Driving me crazy

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

You can't drive me crazy because I am close enough to walk.

Website 4 the day:

Motherboard speaker music?
https://techcrunch.com/2019/02/08/feel-the-beep-this-album-is-played-entirely-on-a-pc-motherboard-speaker/

Crossing paths

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Hiding places:
https://www.familyhandyman.com/smart-homeowner/the-ultimate-guide-for-secret-hiding-places-in-your-home/view-all/

Invention of high heels

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.
-- Christopher Morley

Website 4 the day:

Video games as medicine:
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/doctors-may-soon-prescribe-a-video-game-for-mental-health_n_55c9182ae4b0f1cbf1e60df9

Astrology

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, February 28, 2019, In : Humor

I don’t believe in astrology; I’m a Sagittarius and we’re skeptical.
-- Arthur C. Clarke

Website 4 the day:

Google knows where you have been:
https://www.google.com/maps/timeline

Paper or plastic?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 22, 2019, In : Humor

I bought a box of condoms earlier today. The cashier asked if I'd like a bag. I said "nah, I'll just turn the lights off."

Website 4 the day:

Color consciousness
https://www.eastman.org/sites/default/files/technicolor/pdfs/ColorConsultants_ColorConsciousness.pdf

I hate nostalgia

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 22, 2019, In : Humor

I hate nostalgia. Hated it then and hat it now.
-- Ed Asner

Website 4 the day:

Free proxy list:
http://free-proxy.cz/en/

Not all drugs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 22, 2019, In : Humor

I am not opposed to all drugs. I watch TV.
-- Paul Krassner

Website 4 the day:

Becoming an organism:
http://digg.com/video/cell-division-time-lapse

Tranquilizers for all

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 22, 2019, In : Humor

If everyone took tranquilizers, nobody would need them.
-- Edmund Orrin

Website 4 the day:

Where is Starman?
https://www.whereisroadster.com/

Not by words alone

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 22, 2019, In : Humor

Man does not live by words alone, even though he sometimes has to eat them.
-- Adlai Stevenson

Website 4 the day:

Fastest growing US jobs:
https://bit.ly/2RM2voJ

Baldness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, February 22, 2019, In : Humor

If you're bald, remember that grass doesn't grow on a busy street.
-- William Hague

Website 4 the day:

National Forest typeface:
https://nationalparktypeface.com/Download

I'm a deck of cards!

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, February 5, 2019, In : Humor

A patient bursts into a doctor’s office, "Doctor, I believe I'm a deck of cards!"
The doctor calmly replies, "Go sit in the waiting room, please, I'll be dealing with you later." |

Website 4 the day:

Google slides to animated GIF:
https://talltweets.com/

Nobody is Perfect.

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, February 4, 2019, In : Humor

Nobody is Perfect.
I am Nobody.

Website 4 the day:

Boxes? Hallways?
http://crossdivisions.com/

Salt water fish

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 29, 2019, In : Humor

Fish live in salt water because they sneeze in pepper water.

Website 4 the day:

Map of anonymous Wikipedia edits:
http://www.lkozma.net/wpv/index.html

Not too long

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 29, 2019, In : Humor

If you are not too long, I will wait here for you all my life.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Short films:
http://sheepfilms.co.uk/category/shortfilms/

Expiration dates

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 29, 2019, In : Humor

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Find stigmatized properties:
https://www.housecreep.com/

Would give my right arm

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 24, 2019, In : Humor

I would give my right arm to be ambidextrous!

Website 4 the day:

Shake your head to see an image:
https://www.iflscience.com/editors-blog/latest-viral-optical-illusion-has-you-shaking-your-head-to-see-hidden-image/

Shopping for happiness

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 24, 2019, In : Humor

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop.
-- Gertrude Stein

Website 4 the day:

How much of the internet is fake?
https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2018/12/how-much-of-the-internet-is-fake.html

Write a novel

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, January 24, 2019, In : Humor

I can’t understand why a person will take a year to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.
-- Fred Allen

Website 4 the day:

Public safety streams:
https://www.broadcastify.com/

A thirteenth floor

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, January 16, 2019, In : Humor

Why are builders afraid to have a thirteenth floor but publishers aren't afraid of Chapter 11?

Website 4 the day:

Cat history:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jsj-hDW9bS8

Jury duty

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, January 16, 2019, In : Humor

I have never served on a jury because I am usually the accused.
-- Robert Pinske

Website 4 the day:

Free movies:
https://www.imdb.com/freedive/

Eating and intelligence

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, January 16, 2019, In : Humor

I won't eat any form of intelligent life, but I would gladly eat a network executive.
-- Marty Feldman

Website 4 the day:

Recover lost photos and videos:
https://www.cgsecurity.org/wiki/PhotoRec

Cooking tip

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, January 16, 2019, In : Humor

Cooking tip: wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out.
-- Nicole Hollander

Website 4 the day:

Recover lost data:
https://www.cgsecurity.org/wiki/TestDisk

Live by yourself

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, January 16, 2019, In : Humor

When you live by yourself, all of your annoying habits disappear.
-- Merrill Markoe

Website 4 the day:

Find similar songs:
http://moretrackslikethis.com/

Selling my vacuum

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 8, 2019, In : Humor

I decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. It was just collecting dust.

Website 4 the day:

Motivation game-style:
https://lvluplife.com/

John Madden

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 8, 2019, In : Humor

John Madden is a man who didn't let success go to his clothes.
-- Mike Ditka

Website 4 the day:

If the moon was one pixel:
http://joshworth.com/dev/pixelspace/pixelspace_solarsystem.html

Singer from Rhode Island

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 8, 2019, In : Humor

I first billed myself as a signer from Rhode Island, an act of Providence.
-- George Burns

Website 4 the day:

Memory games:
http://www.memozor.com/memory-game-online-free

A dental plan

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, January 8, 2019, In : Humor

I finally have a dental plan. I chew on the other side.
-- Janine Ditullio

Website 4 the day:

MP3 to text:
https://www.ofoct.com/audio-converter/audio-to-text.html

Is it a missle?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 5, 2019, In : Humor

Is it still called a "missile" if it hits the target?

Website 4 the day:

Create a logo:
https://logomaker.thehoth.com/

No girlfriend

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 5, 2019, In : Humor

I don’t have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who’d be mad at me for saying that.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Web app development community:
https://glitch.com/

Ruination

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, January 5, 2019, In : Humor

Reality continues to ruin my life.
-- Bill Watterson

Website 4 the day:

How funny are words?
https://link.springer.com/article/10.3758/s13428-017-0930-6

So stupid

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, December 25, 2018, In : Humor

A friend was so stupid that he had to change states and take on an assumed name. He was in the Witless Protection Program.

Website 4 the day:

Guesses the character you are thinking of:
https://en.akinator.com/game

Only one regret

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, December 25, 2018, In : Humor

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

MP3 tag editor:
https://www.mp3tag.de/

Be sorry tomorrow

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, December 25, 2018, In : Humor

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow, sleep late.
-- Henny Youngman

Website 4 the day:

Network scanner:
https://angryip.org/

Apple's new car

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 19, 2018, In : Humor

I heard Apple is designing a new automatic car. But they're having trouble installing windows.

Website 4 the day:

#1 song when you were born:
https://playback.fm/birthday-song

Bureaucrats

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 19, 2018, In : Humor

A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds an office that a Republican wants.
-- Harry S. Truman

Website 4 the day:

Program in emojis:
https://www.emojicode.org/

10 percent of brains

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 19, 2018, In : Humor

We only use 10 percent of our brains. Think what we could do if we used the other 60 percent.
-- Ellen DeGeneres

Website 4 the day:

Museum of endangered sounds:
http://savethesounds.info/

General Failure

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, December 19, 2018, In : Humor

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Free PDF editor:
http://pdfedit.cz/en/index.html

Sandwich in a bar

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 16, 2018, In : Humor

A sandwich walks into a bar and orders a whiskey.
“Sorry,” growls the bartender, “we don’t serve food here.”

Website 4 the day:

Cat, solid or liquid?
https://www.sunnyskyz.com/blog/2649/Physicist-Wins-Ig-Noble-Prize-For-Study-On-Whether-Cats-Should-Be-Classified-As-Liquids-Or-Solids

Keep your facts

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 16, 2018, In : Humor

Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.
-- Stephen Colbert

Website 4 the day:

Find your perfect Linux distribution:
https://librehunt.org/

Motivational tapes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 16, 2018, In : Humor

I have a set of motivational tapes, but I never feel like watching them.
-- Daniel Liebert

Website 4 the day:

Download videos:
https://www.xvideothief.com/

Bought a staple gun

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 16, 2018, In : Humor

My husband bought a staple gun. Now we have to bring food to the cat.
-- Rita Rudner

Website 4 the day:

Free streaming movies:
https://www.kanopy.com/

Fine line of cooking

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 16, 2018, In : Humor

My wife treads a fine line between cooking and arson.
-- Bill Hoest

Website 4 the day:

Is your Flash drive fake?
https://www.rmprepusb.com/tutorials/-fake-usb-flash-memory-drives

Failed magicians

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 9, 2018, In : Humor

I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half-sisters.

Website 4 the day:

Free magic tricks:
https://trickshop.com/free-downloads.html

Why a magician?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 9, 2018, In : Humor

I became a magician when my sister told me she got $100 a trick.
-- Michael Finney

Website 4 the day:

$99 Linux laptop:
https://www.forbes.com/sites/jasonevangelho/2018/11/21/pinebook-my-first-few-surprising-hours-with-a-99-linux-laptop/#298169725be2

The noblest dog

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 9, 2018, In : Humor

The noblest dog is the hot dog, which feeds the hand that bites it.
-- Laurence J. Peter

Website 4 the day:

US population by state:
https://www.reddit.com/r/dataisbeautiful/comments/9yasnn/us_population_growth_by_state_19002017_oc/

Too much music

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 9, 2018, In : Humor

Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end.
-- Igor Stravinsky

Website 4 the day:

Google products that flopped:
https://gcemetery.co/

Psychoanalysis takes years

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 9, 2018, In : Humor

Psychoanalysis is a process that usually takes years, which is why Freudians have such lovely summer homes.
-- Cynthia Heimel

Website 4 the day:

Recover deleted files:
https://www.ccleaner.com/recuva

17 days straight

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, December 9, 2018, In : Humor

I've been straight for seventeen days . . . but not all in a row.
-- sam Kinison

Website 4 the day:

Free graphic viewer:
https://www.irfanview.com/

A theatrical performance

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 27, 2018, In : Humor

I saw a theatrical performance of a dictionary. It was a play on words.

Website 4 the day:

Quantum gravity research:
http://www.quantumgravityresearch.org/

Life is short

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, November 27, 2018, In : Humor

Life is too short to learn German.
-- Oscar Wilde

Website 4 the day:

Free TV:
https://view.yahoo.com/

Balloon exercising

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 19, 2018, In : Humor

I used to lift balloons for exercise. But, I stopped because It wasn't really working out.

Website 4 the day:

Pedestrian devoured by sink hole:
https://digg.com/video/sinkhole-lanzhou-city?utm_source=digg&utm_medium=email

Fishing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 19, 2018, In : Humor

Teach a man to fish and he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.
-- Zenna Schaffer

Website 4 the day:

Einstein's concern a decade before rise of Nazis:
https://noox.app/us/3395960

Used to do drugs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 19, 2018, In : Humor

I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
-- Mitch Hedberg

Website 4 the day:

Social media and depression:
https://www.businessinsider.com/facebook-instagram-snapchat-social-media-well-being-2018-11

Truth is beauty

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 19, 2018, In : Humor

It's difficult to reconcile that concept that truth is beauty with orthodontia and nose jobs.
-- Judith Viorst

Website 4 the day:

AI for all:
https://www.acumos.org/

A good listener

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 19, 2018, In : Humor

A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.
-- Katherine Whitehorn

Website 4 the day:

An app to save everything:
https://collect.wetransfer.com/

Sale at a turf farm

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 12, 2018, In : Humor

I just heard that the local turf farm was having a yard sale.

Website 4 the day:

Cheat sheets:
https://www.cheatography.com/

Object in motion or rest

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 12, 2018, In : Humor

An object in motion will continue in the wrong direction. An object at rest will remain in the wrong place.
-- David Gerold

Website 4 the day:

Site for early adopters:
https://betalist.com/

My retirement plan

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 12, 2018, In : Humor

My retirement plan is a slippery floor in a department store.
-- Keith McGill

Website 4 the day:

Make an app or game without programming:
https://www.buildbox.com/

Information booth job

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, November 12, 2018, In : Humor

I was hired for a job in an information booth with no questions asked.
-- Jay London

Website 4 the day:

Sub-$1 microcontrollers compared:
https://jaycarlson.net/microcontrollers/

The auto body shop

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 31, 2018, In : Humor

The auto body shop was wreck-a-mended.

Website 4 the day:

Home for introverts:
https://www.riskology.co/blog/

Breeding rabbits

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 27, 2018, In : Humor

Breeding rabbits was a hare-raising experience.

Website 4 the day:

Penny pictures:
http://www.fincher.org/Misc/Pennies/BigTower.shtml

Refuse to admit

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 27, 2018, In : Humor

I refuse to admit I'm more than fifty-two, even if that does make my sons illegitimate.
-- Nancy Astor

Website 4 the day:

Calculus from over 100 years ago:
https://www.gutenberg.org/files/33283/33283-pdf.pdf

Middle aged

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 27, 2018, In : Humor

I'm 59 and people call me middle aged. How many 118 year old men do you know?
-- Barry Cryer

Website 4 the day:

Meet halfway:
https://www.meetways.com/

This morning

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 17, 2018, In : Humor

Waking up this morning was an eye-opening experience.

Website 4 the day:

Trumpet vs. hair:
http://trumpdonald.org/

Intelligent life

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 17, 2018, In : Humor

Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?
-- Bob Monkhouse

Website 4 the day:

Odd research:
https://www.improbable.com/ig/winners/

Ultimate frustration

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 17, 2018, In : Humor

Nothing is as frustrating as arguing with someone who knows what he's talking about.
-- Sam Ewing

Website 4 the day:

Stephen Hawkings' final paper:
https://arxiv.org/pdf/1810.01847.pdf

Soar in the clouds

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 17, 2018, In : Humor

Eagles may soar in the clouds, but weasels never get sucked into jet engines.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

8 hours of Star Trek bridge sounds:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vnU2qn6-hz4

Camping in nature

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 17, 2018, In : Humor

Camping is nature's way of promoting the motel business.
-- Dave Barry

Website 4 the day:

Count sheep:
http://www.icantsleep.help/

Fond of children

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, October 17, 2018, In : Humor

I am fond of children - except boys.
-- Lewis Carroll

Website 4 the day:

Count the flashes:
https://digg.com/video/rabbit-illusion

Russian Dolls

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, October 15, 2018, In : Humor

I hate Russian Dolls. They're so full of themselves.

Website 4 the day:

Click to remove:
http://www.clicktoremove.com/

Writing a book

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, October 15, 2018, In : Humor

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

This guy wants your money:
http://www.ijustwantyourmoney.com/

Internet answers

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, October 15, 2018, In : Humor

The best way to get the right answer on the internet is not to ask a question; it's to post the wrong answer.
-- Ward Cunningham

Website 4 the day:

Recover from brain freeze:
https://cdn2.hubspot.net/hub/124879/file-1305051026-pdf/GENARD_METHOD_CHEAT_SHEETS/Genard_Method_Cheat_Sheet_5WaysToRecoverFromABrainFreeze_PDF.pdf

Increased esteem

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, October 15, 2018, In : Humor

My esteem for this country has gone up substantially. It is very nice now that when people wave at me, they use all their fingers.
-- Jimmy Carter

Website 4 the day:

Data visualization:
https://serialmentor.com/dataviz/

Never date a tennis player

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, October 6, 2018, In : Humor

Never date a tennis player. Love means nothing to them.

Website 4 the day:

SPAM® museum:
http://www.spam.com/museum

Knowledge vs. underwear

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 5, 2018, In : Humor

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Learn photography:
http://photoskop.com/

So surprised

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 5, 2018, In : Humor

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
-- Gracie Allen

Website 4 the day:

Result of a nuclear bomb:
https://outrider.org/nuclear-weapons/interactive/bomb-blast

Ain't sleeping

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 5, 2018, In : Humor

I ain't sleeping. I'm just taking a good look at the insides of my eyelids.
-- Jonathan Raban

Website 4 the day:

What's it like to be dyslexic:
https://geon.github.io/programming/2016/03/03/dsxyliea

Invention of swearing

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 5, 2018, In : Humor

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.
-- Finley Peter Dunne

Website 4 the day:

Watch a palate make sounds
https://dood.al/pinktrombone/

Every successful man

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, October 5, 2018, In : Humor

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
-- Maryon Pearson

Website 4 the day:

Behind the news:
http://time.com/photography/lightbox/

Neighbor's chickens

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 25, 2018, In : Humor

My neighbor's chickens were eating my garden, so I put up a fence. Now it is impeccable.

Website 4 the day:

If you are bored:
https://www.boredbutton.com/

They laughed at Joan of Arc

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 25, 2018, In : Humor

They laughed at Joan of Arc, but she went right ahead and built it anyway.
-- Gracie Allen

Website 4 the day:

Free wallpaper:
https://interfacelift.com/

Meek inheritance

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 25, 2018, In : Humor

The meek shall inherit the earth. They won't have the nerve to refuse it.
-- Jackie Vernon

Website 4 the day:

Make things:
https://www.tinkercad.com/#/

Only flair

Posted by Ira Chayut on Tuesday, September 25, 2018, In : Humor

Her only flair is in her nostrils.
-- Pauline Kael

Website 4 the day:

Chart of Electromagnetic Radiations:
https://www.flickr.com/photos/llnl/9403051123/sizes/l/

Sued the airline

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 22, 2018, In : Humor

When I sued the airline for my missing luggage, the verdict was that I lost my case.

Website 4 the day:

USA in numbers:
https://usafacts.org/

Major problem mistakes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, September 22, 2018, In : Humor

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.
-- Douglas Adams

Website 4 the day:

Machine learning with Python:
https://towardsdatascience.com/a-complete-machine-learning-walk-through-in-python-part-one-c62152f39420

A dirty bird

Posted by Ira Chayut on Sunday, September 16, 2018, In : Humor

My parrot was dirty, so I bought a feather duster.

Website 4 the day:

Lightning map:
http://en.blitzortung.org/live_lightning_maps.php?map=30

Went for a massage

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 10, 2018, In : Humor

I went for a massage because I wanted to be kneaded.

Website 4 the day:

Accomplishments by your age:
http://www.museumofconceptualart.com/accomplished/index.html

Photographing Shirley Temple

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 10, 2018, In : Humor

They used to photograph Shirley Temple through gauze. They should photograph me through linoleum.
-- Tallulah Bankhead

Website 4 the day:

Better CLI commands:
https://remysharp.com/2018/08/23/cli-improved

Violin vs. viola

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 10, 2018, In : Humor

The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer.
-- Victor Borge

Website 4 the day:

Make slogan great again:
http://beat2020.com/

Of doors and dogs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, September 10, 2018, In : Humor

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.
-- Ogden Nash

Website 4 the day:

Online TV:
http://xumo.tv

Missing eggs

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 31, 2018, In : Humor

The chicken couldn't find her eggs. She must have mislaid them.

Website 4 the day:

Conference call simulator:
http://conferencecall.biz/

Full of it

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 31, 2018, In : Humor

Life is full of obstacle illusions.
-- Grant Frazier

Website 4 the day:

Who loves you more?
https://melmagazine.com/ranking-every-kind-of-pet-by-how-capable-it-is-of-loving-you-72d38f87e20f

Nobody listens

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 31, 2018, In : Humor

No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you'll see why.
-- Mignon McLaughlin

Website 4 the day:

I said don't call me!
http://isaiddontcall.me/

Awake in case of emergency

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 31, 2018, In : Humor

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting.
-- Ronald Reagan

Website 4 the day:

Library e-books and audiobooks:
https://meet.libbyapp.com/

Comes a time

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 31, 2018, In : Humor

There comes a time in every man's life and I've had many of them.
-- Casey Stengel

Website 4 the day:

Text to image:
http://t2i.cvalenzuelab.com/

Walking on water

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 31, 2018, In : Humor

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read "President Can't Swim".
-- Lyndon B. Johnson

Website 4 the day:

Python introduction:
https://medium.freecodecamp.org/learning-python-from-zero-to-hero-120ea540b567

Dog from a hat

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 17, 2018, In : Humor

I saw a magician pull a full-sized dog out of a large hat. It was a Labracadabrador.

Website 4 the day:

Worst search result:
http://feelingunlucky.today/

Dinner music

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 17, 2018, In : Humor

Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist.
-- G. K. Chesterton

Website 4 the day:

Your animal weight:
http://myanimalweight.com/

A good listener

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, August 17, 2018, In : Humor

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.
-- Kin Hubbard

Website 4 the day:

Listen to the moon trip:
https://www.newsweek.com/inside-apollo-11-you-can-now-listen-buzz-aldrin-and-neil-armstrongs-1043435

Back on your feet

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 16, 2018, In : Humor

The best way to get back on your feet — miss a car payment.

Website 4 the day:

The customer is not always right:
https://notalwaysright.com/

Rides from strange men

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, August 16, 2018, In : Humor

Don't accept rides from strange men, and remember that all men are strange.
-- Robin Morgan

Website 4 the day:

How fast is your internet download?
https://fast.com/

Paying taxes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 11, 2018, In : Humor

I believe we should all pay our tax bill with a smile. I tried — but they wanted cash.

Website 4 the day:

Tour the stars:
http://stars.chromeexperiments.com/

Dog adoption

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 11, 2018, In : Humor

I’m planning to adopt a dog soon, it wasn’t my first choice but my doctor told me I can’t have any biologically.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Quantum computers, explained:
https://www.explainingcomputers.com/quantum.html

The 2nd oldest profession

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 11, 2018, In : Humor

Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
-- Ronald Reagan

Website 4 the day:

Curated coding videos:
https://www.codingvideoz.com/

My dream job

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 11, 2018, In : Humor

My dream job would be the Karma delivery service.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

1 second on the internet:
https://tecsynt.com/image/iot-white-paper-one-second.jpg

Chicken crossing the road

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 11, 2018, In : Humor

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn’t cook it!
-- Gordon Ramsay

Website 4 the day:

Time wasting website:
https://clickclickclick.click

It's useless

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 11, 2018, In : Humor

It’s useless to hold a person to anything they say when they are in love, drunk or running for office.
-- Shirley MacLaine

Website 4 the day:

Classic TV shows are sped up:
http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2015/03/04/tv_shows_sped_up_to_make_room_for_ads_can_you_tell_the_difference_a_quiz.html

Emotional wedding

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 4, 2018, In : Humor

I went to a really emotional wedding the other day. The cake was in tiers.

Website 4 the day:

Sacred texts:
http://www.sacred-texts.com/index.htm

What giraffes don't smell

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 4, 2018, In : Humor

I bet giraffes don’t even know what farts smell like.
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Create your own web page:
https://about.me/

Catching my eye

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 4, 2018, In : Humor

I tell you what always catches my eye. Short people with an umbrella.
-- Gary Delaney

Website 4 the day:

Reddit University:
http://ureddit.com/

Who is weaker?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 4, 2018, In : Humor

If you think women are the weaker sex, try pulling the blanket back to your side.
-- Stuart Turner

Website 4 the day:

Track a package:
http://www.boxoh.com/

The biggest critics

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, August 4, 2018, In : Humor

The biggest critics of my books are the people who never read them
-- Jackie Collins

Website 4 the day:

Living wage calculator:
http://livingwage.mit.edu/

A new store

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 26, 2018, In : Humor

I am going to start a new store that only sells Cheerios, bagels, and donuts. It will be called "Hole Foods."

Website 4 the day:

8 hours of Star Trek DS9 Quark's bar sounds:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yyi-5BWRWdM

Terrible things

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 26, 2018, In : Humor

I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened
-- Mark Twain

Website 4 the day:

Free stock videos:
http://makerbook.net/video/

Life v. art

Posted by Ira Chayut on Thursday, July 26, 2018, In : Humor

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.
-- Woody Allen

Website 4 the day:

Free images:
https://www.typeform.com/blog/ask-awesomely/free-pics/

Not going to the nude beach

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 21, 2018, In : Humor

My wife refuses to go to a nude beach with me. She's just being clothes-minded.

Website 4 the day:

Paint on a speaker:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lm75v4Ndlg

If we can't fix it

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 21, 2018, In : Humor

If we can't fix it, it ain't broken.
-- Walt Weir

Website 4 the day:

Programming books:
https://github.com/tpn/pdfs

Fall of the Roman Empire

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 21, 2018, In : Humor

One of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.''
-- Robert Firth

Website 4 the day:

Open source GUI prototyping:
http://pencil.evolus.vn/Default.html

Letter friendly

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 14, 2018, In : Humor

I’m friendly with 25 letters of the alphabet, but I don’t know why.

Website 4 the day:

Log into sites that need a user/password:
http://login2.me/

Cute sleep

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 14, 2018, In : Humor

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet.
-- Will Ferrell

Website 4 the day:

Relax with soothing kitten images:
http://www.eyebleach.me/

Nothing but respect

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 14, 2018, In : Humor

I have nothing but respect for you – and not much of that.
-- Groucho Marx

Website 4 the day:

Conspiracy theory list:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_conspiracy_theories

Weather forecast

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, July 14, 2018, In : Humor

Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
-- George Carlin

Website 4 the day:

Worm follows mouse:
http://www.staggeringbeauty.com/

I want to win

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 4, 2018, In : Humor

I want to win a huge lottery payoff, just like my dad. He never won, but he wanted to.

Website 4 the day:

Free videos:
http://videos.pexels.com

Flowers for no reason

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 4, 2018, In : Humor

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there’s a reason.
-- Molly McGee

Website 4 the day:

Low power Linux:
http://www.bodhilinux.com/

Life's problem

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, July 4, 2018, In : Humor

The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.
-- Milton Berle

Website 4 the day:

HTML e-mail for Gmail:
https://htmlmail.pro/

Health club position

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

I applied for a position in a health club, but they said I wasn't fit for the job.

Website 4 the day:

Innovators and entrepreneurs:
http://www.npr.org/podcasts/510313/how-i-built-this

Terrified by women

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

The most terrifying thing any woman can say to me is “Notice anything different?
-- Mike Vanatta

Website 4 the day:

Computational cognitive neuroscience:
https://grey.colorado.edu/mediawiki/sites/CompCogNeuro/images/0/0e/ccnbook_08_2016.pdf

Getting a child's attention

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.
-- Lane Olinghouse

Website 4 the day:

Rewriter tools:
https://www.rewritertools.com/

Coffee or tea?

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
-- Abraham Lincoln

Website 4 the day:

Details on any web site:
http://builtwith.com

Facebook name

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

I'm changing my name to 'Benefits' on Facebook. Next time someone adds me, It will say "you are now friends with Benefits."

Website 4 the day:

Web programming playground:
https://webmakerapp.com

Watching my drinking

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.
-- Rodney Dangerfield

Website 4 the day:

Make a comic:
https://www.pixton.com/

Addicted

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

I’m addicted to placebos.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Generate spreadsheet mock data:
https://mockaroo.com/

No talent

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 23, 2018, In : Humor

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by then I was too famous.
-- Robert Benchley

Website 4 the day:

Goldbach Conjecture calculator:
http://wims.unice.fr/wims/wims.cgi?module=tool/number/goldbach.en

Chapstick v. Glue Stick

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

My girlfriend asked me to pass her the Chapstick and I accidentally passed her the Glue Stick! She hasn't said a word to me since.

Website 4 the day:

Hi-def NYC flyover:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UN3uF3990Q0

Everybody lies

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter because nobody listens.
-- Nick Diamos

Website 4 the day:

VPN comparison:
https://thatoneprivacysite.net/vpn-comparison-chart/

Indonesian drivers

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

Once you see the drivers in Indonesia, you understand why religion plays such a big part in their lives.
-- Erma Bombeck

Website 4 the day:

Digital literacy terms:
https://www.tolerance.org/magazine/fall-2017/speaking-of-digital-literacy

Going to an opera

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

Going to an opera, like getting drunk, is a sin that carries its own punishment.
-- Hannah More

Website 4 the day:

Thinking in systems:
http://ncase.me/loopy/

An oboe

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

An oboe is an ill wind that nobody blows good.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Software project management (free for a three-member team):
https://clubhouse.io/

High heating bill

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

My landlord wanted to make an appointment to talk to me about how high my heating bill is. I told him, "My door is always open".

Website 4 the day:

Audio-only television:
http://blindy.tv/

Love my friends

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

I love my friends. Without them, I'd be the most screwed-up person I know.
-- Margo Black

Website 4 the day:

Remove website malware:
https://hackercombat.com/fix-malware-from-your-website-free/

Driving too fast

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

I drive much too fast to worry about cholesterol.
-- Steven Wright

Website 4 the day:

Check files or websites for viruses:
https://www.virustotal.com/#/home/upload

Ignorance is bliss

Posted by Ira Chayut on Monday, June 11, 2018, In : Humor

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?
-- Philip Howard

Website 4 the day:

AI Algorithms:
http://wps.aw.com/wps/media/objects/5771/5909832/PDF/Luger_0136070477_1.pdf

Shoveling snow

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 2, 2018, In : Humor

I told my wife that it was her turn to shovel and salt the front steps. All I got was icy stares.

Website 4 the day:

Why we like junk food:
http://jamesclear.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/why-humans-like-junk-food-steven-witherly.pdf

Dissatisfied with life

Posted by Ira Chayut on Saturday, June 2, 2018, In : Humor

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
-- Will Rogers

Website 4 the day:

Mount. St. Helens missing photos:
https://www.whas11.com/mobile/article/news/local/mount-st-helens-eruption-never-before-published-photos/417-550397455

Blonde jokes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Friday, June 1, 2018, In : Humor

I'm not offended by all the dumb-blonde jokes because I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde.
-- Dolly Parton

Website 4 the day:

Remove USB write protection:
https://windows101tricks.com/how-to-remove-write-protection-from-usb

Great reflexes

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, May 30, 2018, In : Humor

With great reflexes comes great response ability.

Website 4 the day:

Laws of spacecraft design:
https://spacecraft.ssl.umd.edu/akins_laws.html

Making exercise fun

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, May 30, 2018, In : Humor

Wouldn’t exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them?“
-- Bill Murray

Website 4 the day:

Free 3D CAD:
https://www.onshape.com/

Avoid temptation

Posted by Ira Chayut on Wednesday, May 30, 2018, In : Humor

Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.
-- Joey Adams

Website 4 the day:

Chrome browser's malware detector:
https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/tips/web-browsers/using-chrome-settings-cleanup-to-scan-for-unwanted-software-using-chrome/